Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The Graph illustrates the number of labour market in the US between 1960 to 2020. It features four sectors namely the manufacturing market, retail, agriculture, and healthcare respectively.

The number of jobs for the manufacturing sector rose from 15 million to 20 million from the year 1960 to 1980. However there was a gradual decline from 1980 to 2020. From the year 1980, the manufacturing market went down from 15 million jobs to 14 million. However the retail industry rose gradually from the year 1960 with 6 million employment market to 16 million jobs by the year 2020. The Healthcare industry jobs were gradually increasing from the year 1960 to 1980, but rose sharply to 16 million by the year 2020. Among all the jobs, the agriculture job market had performed poorly. From the year 1960, the job market had 6 million jobs but it declined gradually till 1980, and from there, the jobs were stable for a time and had a slight decline till 2020.

Overall, The healthcare and the retail job market had improved compare to the agriculture and the manufacturing sectors in the US.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and report several key movements, including manufacturing’s rise to 20 million by 1980 and agriculture’s overall decline. The closing comparison also recognises that healthcare and retail grew while agriculture fell. However, some figures and trends are inaccurate or incomplete: manufacturing falls from 20 million to about 13 million, not from 15 to 14 million, and healthcare rises sharply after 1980, reaching about 16 million in 2020. Retail’s increase to 16 million is reported, but its steady rise through 2000 is not clearly traced. The overview is relevant but broad; it should state the main ranking changes, such as healthcare and retail catching up with manufacturing by 2020. More precise reporting of the major stages would make the summary fuller and clearer.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a body describing the sectors, and a concluding overview. The sequence is generally easy to follow, and contrast markers such as “However” help signal changes. Some connections are repetitive or unclear, though. “However” appears several times close together, and the manufacturing sentence saying it “went down from 15 million jobs to 14 million” conflicts with the earlier figures, making the progression difficult to track. The sectors are also discussed in a long body paragraph, so comparisons between them are less visible. Grouping the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, with clearer links such as “By contrast” and “Meanwhile,” would improve progression and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “gradual decline,” “rose sharply,” “stable,” and “slight decline,” which helps describe trends. However, several expressions are imprecise or unnatural for a chart report: “number of labour market,” “manufacturing market,” and “employment market” do not accurately name the number of jobs in a sector. “Performed poorly” is also evaluative rather than neutral, and “improved” is vague when describing employment figures. Repeated use of “job market” limits precision. Choose consistent terms such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” and “sector,” and use neutral trend language. This would make the vocabulary more accurate and appropriately formal without requiring more complicated wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “However” and “but,” and the overall meaning is usually understandable. Some grammatical errors remain. In the opening, “between 1960 to 2020” uses the wrong paired prepositions; write “between 1960 and 2020.” The phrase “the manufacturing market went down” also has an unclear subject, while “the agriculture job market had 6 million jobs” uses an awkward construction. There are inconsistencies in capitalisation, such as “The healthcare” after a full stop and “Overall, The healthcare.” Work on accurate sentence patterns for describing figures, consistent articles and capital letters, and punctuation around linking words. These corrections would make the report more controlled and easier to read.

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