Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph provides information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the United States economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the number of jobs in manufacturing and agriculture sector decreased significantly; whereas retail and healthcare sector saw a dramatic rise in the number of jobs in the given period.

People working in the agriculture sector were just above 5 million in 1960, afterthat, their numbers declined gradully for the next two decades with almost four million people. After that, jobs remained stable for the next two decaded then dropped slightly till the end of people at approximately three million people. The manufacturing sector was at the top from the start of the period with 15 million people, than it rose significantly for the next two decades and reached at twenty million people in 1980. After that, the figures declined dramatically till the end of period at almost 13 million people working in this sector.

The healthcare sector started at lowest point with almost two million people in 1960, after that the figure rose dramatically and this sector became the top sector at the end of period with just over 15 million people. The retail sector increased dramatically between 1960 and 2000 with more than 5 million and almost 15 million jobs respectively. However, the numbers increased slightly for the next two decades with just over 15 million people working in this sector in the year 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You give a clear overview of the main contrast: manufacturing and agriculture decline overall, while retail and healthcare grow. The key figures and turning points are mostly reported accurately, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980 and healthcare’s rise from about 2 million to around 16 million. You also compare the sectors at the end of the period. However, there are a few imprecisions: agriculture ends at about 2 million, not “approximately three million,” and healthcare and retail finish at roughly the same level rather than healthcare clearly becoming the top sector. The overview is relevant and the main trends are supported, though these comparisons should be stated more precisely and consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall progression: an introduction, a summary of the broad trends, and two paragraphs describing the declining and rising sectors. Grouping agriculture with manufacturing, then healthcare with retail, makes the information easy to follow. Time markers such as “in 1960,” “after that,” and “at the end of period” help show sequence. However, “after that” is repeated several times, making some links mechanical, and the agriculture account moves through its stages in a slightly confusing way. The comparison between healthcare and retail at the end could also be connected more explicitly. More varied linking and clearer references would make the progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “declined,” “remained stable,” “rose significantly,” and “increased slightly,” which helps describe different trends. Some variation in verbs is also evident across the sectors. However, several word choices and collocations are imprecise or repetitive: “the top sector” is less natural than “the largest employer,” and “numbers increased dramatically” does not fit the modest rise in retail after 2000. There are also spelling errors, including “gradully” and “decaded,” and “afterthat” should be written as two words. Aim for accurate trend language and check spelling carefully; these improvements would make your descriptions more precise and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a contrast with “whereas” and time clauses beginning “After that.” The main meaning is generally clear, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “manufacturing and agriculture sector” needs plural agreement and an article or possessive form, while “retail and healthcare sector saw” has the same agreement issue. In “reached at twenty million,” the verb pattern is incorrect, and “at end of period” is missing an article. Some long sentences also combine several stages without clear punctuation. Practise subject–verb agreement, articles, and verb patterns such as “reached 20 million”; then proofread sentence boundaries and punctuation.

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