Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the graph chart illsutrates information about number of jobs in four different sectors of economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it can be seen that the manufacturing sector has dominated the jib market for almost 40 years with the highest number of jobs and the agriculture sector had the lowest number of jobs while other sectors like healthcare and retail kept growing over the years.

In 1960, manufacturing sector had the highest number of job among other sectors with a number of 15 millions jobs followed by agricalture and retail jobs had the same number of jobs with 5 millions jobs while healthcare had less than 5 millions jobs at the same year.

In 1980, manufacturing sector increased sharply to reach 20 millons job , followed by retail sector that showed an increase an reahched 10 million jibs same as healthcare that has grown from less than 5 millions job in 1960 to 5 millions in 1980. But agriculture showed an important dicrease .

In 2000, manufacturing sector decreased importnantly to less than 20 millions jobs while both retail and healthcare sectors kept growing . the agriculture sectors kept stable with same number of jobs as in 1980.

After having the highest figure and number of jobs, the manufacturing sector marked an importnat dicrease to reach less than 15 millions jobs in 2020. At the other hand, both retail and healthcare increased to reach over 15 millions jobs wich is the highest number of jobs in the US in 2020. For the argiculture sector the figure kept descreasing to reach it lowest number in the same year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You provide a relevant overview, identifying manufacturing as the leading sector for much of the period and agriculture as the smallest, while noting growth in retail and healthcare. You also cover all four years and sectors, so the main trends are addressed. However, several figures are inaccurate or too vague: in 1960, retail and agriculture were about 6 million, not 5 million; in 2000, manufacturing was about 17 million, rather than simply “less than 20”; and in 2020, retail and healthcare were both about 16 million. The overview could also state more precisely that healthcare and retail ended jointly highest. More exact comparisons and clearer reporting of key values would make the account more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction and overview are followed by paragraphs organised around the four years. This makes the chronology easy to follow, and phrases such as “In 1980” and “In 2000” help signal changes. However, the year-by-year approach leads to repetitive sentence patterns and does not always compare sectors directly. Some links are awkward or unclear, including “followed by retail sector … same as healthcare” and “At the other hand.” The final paragraph also combines several comparisons without a clear sequence. Grouping related trends—for example, the rise of retail and healthcare against the decline of manufacturing and agriculture—would create stronger progression and more natural cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “highest number,” “stable,” and “kept growing,” so the main trends can generally be understood. However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or repetitive. Phrases such as “marked an important decrease,” “showed an increase an reached,” and “the highest figure and number of jobs” are not natural collocations. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “illsutrates,” “agricalture,” “millons,” and “dicrease,” which reduce the overall control of vocabulary. Aim for precise trend language such as “rose to,” “declined to,” “remained stable,” and “peaked at,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex sentences, including clauses linked with “while” and “after,” and the overall meaning is usually clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, plurals, and sentence construction. For example, “manufacturing sector had” needs an article, while “15 millions jobs” should use the singular unit form. The sentence beginning “In 1980” becomes difficult to follow because several clauses are joined without clear grammatical boundaries. There are also tense and agreement problems, such as “healthcare that has grown” within a past-time account and “the agriculture sectors kept stable.” Use consistent past tense, check singular/plural agreement, and divide long comparisons into complete, well-punctuated sentences.

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