Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given line graph illustrates the count of job in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare sector in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, in case of number of jobs in the manufacturing sector topped the chart. whereas, healthcare sector was ranked the least during given time span.

In 1960, it is observed that in case of jobs the top seat was notched by manufacturing sector with 15 millions, followed by retail and agriculture sector which were recorded just over 5 millions each and the data for healthcare sector was nearly 3 millions. After two decades, the former figure rose and stood at 20 millions and the data for the retail and agriculture sector increased slightly to 10 and 5 millions respectively.while, in case of agriculture sector data decreased to nearly 5 miilions.

Getting into further details, taking maufacturing sector in consideration the count of jobs fell sharply to nearly 13 millions till 2020 and the figure for retail and agriculture sector increased sharply to just over 15 millions in 2020. while the jobs in agriculture sector drop slowly and accounted nearly 2 millions in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies several relevant figures and attempts to describe changes over time, but the main features are not reported accurately enough. The overview says manufacturing “topped the chart” while healthcare “was ranked the least” throughout; in fact, manufacturing led only until 2000, and by 2020 retail and healthcare were joint highest at about 16 million. There are also contradictory and inaccurate details: agriculture fell to about 3 million by 1980, not increased to 5 million, and the later sentence repeats a decline to 2 million. The account therefore gives only a partial picture of the graph. Focus on the overall shifts and compare the four sectors consistently, checking each figure against the chart.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable paragraph structure: an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. It also uses some sequencing expressions, such as “In 1960,” “After two decades” and “Getting into further details,” which help signal time and progression. However, the organisation is weakened by unclear or contradictory links between ideas. For example, the 1980 sentence says agriculture “increased slightly to 10 and 5 millions,” then immediately says it “decreased to nearly 5 millions”; the reader cannot tell which figure belongs to which sector. “Whereas” and “while” are also used awkwardly, and punctuation around these transitions is inconsistent. Grouping the trends more clearly and using accurate references would make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses a reasonable range of vocabulary for describing a graph, including “rose,” “fell sharply,” “increased” and “accounted,” and the topic is generally understandable. However, several choices are unnatural or imprecise, such as “top seat was notched by,” “former figure,” and “in case of number of jobs.” Repetition of “data” and “sector” also limits flexibility. There are spelling errors, including “miilions” and “maufacturing,” and “count of job” is not an appropriate form for this context. Aim for standard chart language such as “the number of jobs,” “stood at,” “reached” and “declined,” and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

There are attempts to use both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses beginning “After two decades” and “taking manufacturing sector in consideration.” However, grammatical control is uneven, and errors sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to understand. Examples include “the count of job,” “manufacturing sector topped the chart” without an article, and “the figure for retail and agriculture sector increased” where the plural subject requires clearer agreement and reference. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also unreliable: “whereas” begins a fragment after a full stop, and “respectively.while” runs two clauses together. Practise accurate articles, plurals, subject–verb agreement and punctuation, while keeping longer sentences simple enough to control.

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