Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in different economic sectors. Manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare in us between 1960 and 2020. The number of jobs are calculated in millions. overall, healthcare has grown steadily , retail sector also been dominent from sectors. The lowest one is agriculture.

In 1960 the healthcare sector grows steadily till 2020 having above 15 million jobs. The retail sector grew from 6 million to above 15 million . these two contribute the most jobs from 1960 to 2020.conversly , Agriculture began with around 6 million jobs in 1960, from that ownards dropping roughly to 3 million before slightly decreasing to 2 million in 2020.

In 1960, Manufacturing have more jobs then the other sections 15 million , which rise steadily to 20 million and that there wos a dump. In 2020 manufactring wos little bellow 15 million which is much decrease .In 2020 the healthcare and reatil were almost at the same point roundabout to 16 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several important patterns, including manufacturing’s early lead, agriculture’s decline, and healthcare and retail reaching similar levels by 2020. However, the overview is unclear: saying retail was “dominant” does not capture that manufacturing led initially, while healthcare and retail were joint highest at the end. Some details are also inaccurate or imprecise. Healthcare did not grow steadily from 1960; it rose from about 2 million jobs, and manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980 before falling to about 13 million. The phrase “these two contribute the most jobs from 1960 to 2020” overgeneralises their positions across the whole period. A clearer overview and more accurate comparisons would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about the sectors, and it uses some linking expressions such as “In 1960” and “Conversely.” These help readers follow the broad timeline. However, the progression is not consistently clear: the overview combines several claims without explaining how the sectors compare, and the final paragraph shifts between manufacturing and the 2020 healthcare-retail comparison. Some connections are awkward or unclear, particularly “from that onwards dropping” and “which rise steadily to 20 million and that there was a dump.” Organise the body into clearer comparisons—for example, grouping the rising sectors and then the declining ones—and use linking phrases to show contrasts and changes over time.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “grew,” “dropping,” “jobs,” and “million,” so the main trends can generally be understood. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems make the description less precise. “Dominent” is not an appropriate way to describe a sector’s job total, and “there was a dump” appears to mean a sharp fall. Errors such as “conversly,” “manufactring,” and “reatil” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise trend language and check spelling carefully; terms such as “peaked,” “declined,” and “remained stable” would help you describe the data more clearly and avoid repeating basic verbs.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, but control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. For example, “The number of jobs are calculated” has subject–verb disagreement, while “In 1960 the healthcare sector grows steadily till 2020” uses an unsuitable tense and does not form a clear comparison. The sentence beginning “In 1960, Manufacturing have more jobs” also has errors in tense and sentence construction. Punctuation and capitalisation are uneven, with several run-on sentences and missing spaces after full stops. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, use past tense consistently for the historical data, and separate related comparisons with accurate punctuation.

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