Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph illustrates the jobs in various sectors of economy in US between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the highest figure shown in graph was manufacturing sector. By 2020, healthcare and retail had approximately equal employment, at around 16 million jobs. Meanwhile, the least peak shown by agricultural segment jobs.

At the start of graph, the highest jobs provide 15 million jobs in 1960 by manufacturing sector and form peak in 1980 but it fell down in 2000 and 2020.

The healthcare profession have 2 million jobs in 1960, which increased in 1980 5 million jobs and the graph signifacantly rise and reached highest point in 2020.

In agricultural and retail segments ,at first the line increase and provide 6 million jobs but agricultural sector significantly decreased in 1980 and consistently remain same over next years. Meanwhile, the retail sector rise and gradually increased and form sharp peak n 2000 and remain sustained till end.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify several important patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak in 1980 before declining, healthcare grows strongly, and agriculture falls. The overview also correctly notes that healthcare and retail finish at roughly the same level. However, the claim that manufacturing was the highest figure overall is not accurate: it leads early on, but by 2020 retail and healthcare are both around 16 million, above manufacturing at about 13 million. Some details are unclear or incomplete, such as saying retail formed a “sharp peak” in 2000 when it continued to rise slightly to 2020. To strengthen the report, compare the sectors more precisely across the period and make the overall ranking at the end clear.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and separate descriptions of trends, so the reader can follow the main subject. The use of “Overall” and “Meanwhile” helps signal relationships between ideas. However, the organisation becomes less clear in the final paragraph, where agriculture and retail are discussed together despite moving in opposite directions. Some linking is mechanical, and references such as “the highest jobs” and “the line” are not always precise. Grouping the two declining/rising trends separately, and using clearer comparisons between sectors, would create a more consistent progression and make the relationships easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased,” “decreased,” “consistently” and “peak,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, several choices are imprecise or unnatural for a data report: “least peak” does not clearly describe agriculture’s low figures, “jobs provide” is an awkward collocation, and “form sharp peak” overstates retail’s gradual rise. There are also spelling errors, including “signifacantly,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for a more controlled set of trend expressions and use them precisely—for example, distinguish a peak from a steady increase or a low point. This would improve clarity and appropriateness without requiring more elaborate vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex sentences, including a relative clause in “which increased in 1980 5 million jobs.” The main trends can usually be understood, but some grammatical errors affect accuracy. For example, “the healthcare profession have” has subject–verb disagreement, while “increased in 1980 5 million jobs” is missing a preposition and clearer sentence structure. The opening also uses “between 1960 to 2020” rather than the correct paired construction. Articles and sentence boundaries are inconsistent, as in “form peak in 1980.” Practise accurate past-tense reporting and patterns such as “rose from…to…”; retaining varied sentence forms while checking these basics would make the account more reliable.

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