Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrate the data about the rate of employment in different areas of the economy in the United States during 1960 and 2020 .

Overall , there is a significant increase in the filde of healthcare and ratail by the time . and there is a boom in start and downfall in the number of jobs in manufactuing sector .Whereas agriculture sector also goes down and down from 1960 to 2020 .

In 1960 , the jobs in heathcare sector starts from 2.5 million and reaches above 15 million in 2020. This trend goes faster druing the whole time .The trend in agriculture sector starts above then 5 million but in 2020 it reaches at 2.5 million only with greate downfall . The jobs in manufacturing feild starts from 15 million in1960 and goes to 20 million in 1980 . but after that is went down and stops at 12.5 million in 2020. The retail field starts above then 5 million and goes up to 15 million in 2020.

So, there is a flactuation in number of jobs between all four sector during 1960 and 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: healthcare and retail rise, manufacturing peaks and then declines, and agriculture falls. You also include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 and falling to about 12.5 million by 2020. However, some details are inaccurate: healthcare ends at about 16 million, not “above 15” as a precise description, and retail rises to about 16 million by 2020 rather than 15. The overview also says there is a “boom in start,” which does not clearly explain the manufacturing trend, and the final claim of “flactuation” is too general. A clearer overview comparing the leading sectors at the end and the steady decline in agriculture would make the key features more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details, and it groups several sector trends together. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is weakened by unclear or repetitive linking, particularly the final sentence, “So, there is a flactuation in number of jobs between all four sector,” which adds little after the details. Some transitions are awkward, such as “Whereas agriculture sector also goes down and down,” and punctuation around sentence boundaries is inconsistent. Organise the body into clearer comparisons—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together—and use linking phrases such as “By contrast” or “Meanwhile” accurately. This would make the relationships between figures easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “employment,” “sector,” “increase,” “downfall,” and “reaches,” so the general subject is understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural: “rate of employment” does not describe the number of jobs shown, “boom in start” is unclear, and “goes down and down” is informal and repetitive. Spelling errors such as “filde,” “ratail,” “manufactuing,” “heathcare,” and “flactuation” also reduce precision. Aim for accurate, conventional chart language, such as “the number of jobs,” “rose steadily,” “peaked at,” and “declined to.” Check spelling carefully, especially for the sector names, so the reader can focus on the comparisons.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, and the main trends can generally be understood. However, errors in sentence structure and grammatical control occur throughout. For example, “The line graph illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, while “during 1960 and 2020” uses an unsuitable time construction. Several sentences have faulty or incomplete patterns, including “This trend goes faster druing the whole time” and “but after that is went down.” Articles and plurals are also inconsistent, as in “between all four sector.” Punctuation and spacing around full stops and commas need attention. Practise forming accurate past-tense descriptions and complete clauses, then check each sentence for agreement, articles, and plural endings.

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