Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph illustrates the details of employment in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors in US in a period of six decades.

Overall, retail and healthcare contributed the highest employment opportunities in the country while manufacturing and agriculture the least.

In the beginning of the period, healthcare had the lowest jobs at around 2 million but with time the number rose steadly to 5 million in the year 1980. By the the year 2000, the opportunities had doubled to about 11 million and by the end of the period, it increased by 50 %.

Simillaly, retail sector had an increase from around 5 million in the year 1960 but it moved to 15 million in the year 2000 but remained constant up to 2020.

Both Agriculture and manufacturing had jobs decrease at the end of the period, where manufacturing had 15 million in the year 1960 but closed lower than 15 million when the period ended.

In conclusion, healthcare and retain remained the sectors that will be depended on in the future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the four sectors and describe several key movements, including healthcare’s rise from about 2 million to 16 million and manufacturing’s decline after 1980. The overview also recognises that employment patterns changed over time. However, some comparisons are inaccurate or too general: retail rose from about 6 million to 16 million, rather than remaining constant after 2000, and manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million. The claim that retail and healthcare were the highest throughout is not supported, since manufacturing led for much of the period. The final prediction about future dependence is not shown by the graph. Select the main trends more precisely and support them with accurate comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall shape: an introduction, an overview, descriptions of individual trends, and a concluding sentence. Time markers such as “In the beginning of the period” and “By the year 2000” help the reader follow the chronology, and “Similarly” signals a comparison. This coherent arrangement meets the task well, though some links are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Both Agriculture and manufacturing had jobs decrease at the end of the period” groups the sectors without explaining their different patterns, while the conclusion introduces a future claim rather than drawing together the reported trends. Organise the body around contrasting patterns—rising sectors versus declining sectors—and use clearer references to the relevant years and figures.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “employment opportunities,” “rose,” “doubled,” and “remained constant,” so the main trends are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “contributed the highest employment opportunities,” although this collocation is unnatural for describing job totals. Some word choices are imprecise: “closed lower than 15 million” is less direct than saying employment fell to 13 million, and “depended on in the future” adds a meaning the graph does not establish. Spelling errors such as “steadly,” “Simillaly,” and “retain” also reduce accuracy. Use precise trend verbs and check spelling, especially for key sector names.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses with “but” and time phrases such as “By the year 2000.” Most sentences remain understandable, and the sequence of past changes is usually clear. Some grammatical errors persist, however. In “while manufacturing and agriculture the least,” the second clause is missing a verb; “the number rose” should be followed by “steadily”; and “by the end of the period, it increased” shifts awkwardly from the past trend to a simple past form where “had increased” or “reached” would be clearer. There is also an extra “the” in “By the the year 2000.” Review articles, verb forms, and sentence completeness, while continuing to vary sentence structures.

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