Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph tracks the changes in number of jobs in four sectors of the economy, manufacturing, retail, Agriculture, or healthcare in the united states between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, data illustrate that jobs in manufacturing sector is comparatively higher then the other sectors. therefore the lowest jobs jobs numbers are from agriculture sector however, the surge has been observe in number of jobs in healthcare sector and in retail jobs.

From 1960 there was 15 millions jobs in manufacturing, and it shows peak level 20 millions in 1980, then declined in 2020 thus less then 5 millions millions jobs were in healthcare sector increases to 15 million in 2020.

regarding the remaining sector agriculture and retail, retail generate 5 millions jobs in 1960 and increases to 15 million in 2020. therefore agriculture jobs are the lowest jobs contributing in economy from 5 millions jobs in 1960 to lowest in 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview that agriculture had the fewest jobs while healthcare and retail increased. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing was not consistently the largest sector, as retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, above manufacturing at 13 million. Several figures and trends are also misreported: retail began at about 6 million, not 5, and healthcare rose to about 16 million, not 15; manufacturing fell to 13 million, not below 5. Agriculture declined from about 6 to 2 million. The response is also 8 words below the 150-word minimum. Include a clearer overview and accurately compare the main changes.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some organisation: you begin with an introduction, provide an overview, and then attempt to discuss the sectors. However, the progression is difficult to follow because key information is compressed into unclear sentences. For example, “then declined in 2020 thus less then 5 millions millions jobs were in healthcare sector increases” combines manufacturing and healthcare trends without a clear boundary, making it hard to identify which figure belongs to which sector. Linking words such as “therefore” are repeated and do not always show a logical relationship. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and the main details, and group the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise referencing would make the report easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “line graph,” “sector,” “peak level,” “declined,” and “surge,” so the reader can recognise the topic and intended trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive, such as “lowest jobs jobs numbers,” “retail generate,” and “jobs contributing in economy.” There are also noticeable spelling and form errors, including “united states,” “then” for “than,” and “observe” where a past participle is needed. These issues sometimes make the meaning less clear. Aim for precise reporting phrases such as “the number of jobs,” “rose to,” and “fell to,” and check spelling and word forms before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, but control is inconsistent, and frequent errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to understand. Examples include “jobs in manufacturing sector is,” where subject–verb agreement and the article are missing, and “From 1960 there was 15 millions jobs,” which has problems with tense, number, and sentence construction. The long sentence beginning “then declined in 2020” also joins separate trends without a clear grammatical structure. Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, particularly at sentence beginnings and around clauses. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and build shorter, complete sentences first; then connect them with clear clauses. This will help you express comparisons without losing grammatical control.

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