Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the details about the number of employment in four sectors (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare) of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

The provided information showed that, manufacturing sector was the top back in 1960 with the 15 millions total jobs. The number increased 25% in next two decades. However, the sector didn't contain the top position till the next 20 years and droped to back at 15 millions where it's belongs. In the next 20 years, more declined in the numbers and the end result showed no progress, just continue fall.

The retail sector which is the 2nd best in 1960 with the starting number of around 5 millions jobs, in terms of higher jobs make progress upwords till year 2000 (5 millions job) and crossed the number one sector too just after few years. After that their is no progress shown in the chart till the year 2020. However, the number remains same (15 millions) with no ups and down. Currently, In the year of 2020-both retail and healthcare sector at the same point with the 15 milions of jobs which is still 25% less then the manufacturing sector offerd in the year 1980, almost 40 years ago.

Healthcare sector started with 2.5 millions jobs per year and growth showed 2.5 millons of job increased in next 20 years. In next two decades, the numbers almost doubled to 10.1 millions jobs something. At the end, results in 2020 is around 15 million, which is around overall 12.5 millions of increase in jobs.

The agriculture sector didn't showed any advancment and continue the drop from 5 millions jobs in 1960 to 2.5 in 1980 and after that just stayed same.

Overall, Manufacturing sector was at top with 20 millions jobs in 1980. However, retail and healthcare are currently at te top with around 15 millions jobs. Healthcare and retail both progress gradually slowly from 2.5 million and 5 million respectivily. .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main sectors and include several relevant trends, especially manufacturing’s peak in 1980 and the rise of healthcare and retail. However, some key figures and comparisons are inaccurate: manufacturing falls to about 17 million in 2000 and 13 million in 2020, not 15 million and then an unspecified continued fall; retail rises to about 15 million by 2000 and 16 million in 2020, rather than remaining unchanged at 15 million. The overview also says retail and healthcare are both around 15 million, while the chart places them at about 16 million. Agriculture’s 1960 figure is about 6 million, not 5 million. Select the clearest overall patterns and report the endpoint values accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response is divided into paragraphs by sector and ends with an overview, so the reader can follow its broad organisation. You also use time markers such as “in the next 20 years” and contrastive links such as “However.” However, the progression is weakened by repetition and unclear references: the retail paragraph says the sector “crossed the number one sector” without making clear which series or value is meant, then repeats that the figure remains the same. The overview comes after the detailed paragraphs and partly repeats them rather than efficiently summarising the main patterns. Grouping the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, with a concise overview first, would make comparisons and progression clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of trend vocabulary, including “increased,” “declined,” “doubled,” and “remains,” and use relevant terms such as “sector” and “jobs.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive, which sometimes makes the intended trend difficult to understand. Phrases such as “the top,” “no progress,” and “the number one sector” are imprecise for describing a line graph, while “number of employment” is not a natural expression. Spelling errors, including “droped,” “advancment,” and “respectivily,” also reduce accuracy. Use precise verbs such as “peaked,” “fell,” and “overtook,” and check spelling and natural combinations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “However” and “which,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in sentence structure, tense, agreement, articles, and plurals occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. For example, “the number increased 25% in next two decades” needs an article and a clearer construction, while “retail and healthcare sector at the same point” lacks a verb and has a number-agreement problem. The sentence beginning “The retail sector which is the 2nd best…” is also incomplete as written. Practise building accurate comparisons with a clear subject and verb, and use past tense consistently when describing the historical data.

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