Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given graph shows the number of jobs in the four sectors of economy in the US from the year [redacted phone]. The number of jobs are in millions from 0 to 25. The 4 sectors of economy in the job industry are manufacturing , retail , agriculture and healthcare .

In the graph each sector has been represented by a different shape. The manufacturing sector has circle , the retail sector has triangle , the agriculture sector has square and the healthcare sector has diamond.

The manufacturing sector had started from 15 million jobs in 1960, then it was increased in the year 1980 by 5 million and then from the year 2000 to 2020 it had decreased by around 6 to 7 million.

The retail sector had started from around 5.5 million jobs in the year 1960 , then increased till 10 in the year 1980, and it had kept increasing from the year 1980 to 2000 and 2000 to 2020 by 6 and 4 million respectively.

The agricultural sector had started in the year 1960, with around 5.5 million jobs , then it decreased to 3 million from the year 1980 to 2000, and it decreased even more from the year 2000 to 2020 by around 1 million. The jobs in agricultural sector had decreased gradually as there were

The healthcare sector had started from around 2 million jobs in the year 1960, then increased to 5 million jobs in 1980 , and it kept increasing. In the year 2000, it had around 11 million jobs and by the year 2020 it had reached till around 16 million jobs beacuse of cases of covid in the year 2020 at such a high rate .

So , this is the detail about the jobs in the 4 sectors of the economy in US.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You report several key figures accurately, including manufacturing’s rise from 15 million to 20 million before falling, and healthcare’s growth to about 16 million. However, the response does not provide a clear overview of the main patterns or comparisons, which is central to this task. Some details are inaccurate or unclear: manufacturing falls from 17 million in 2000 to 13 million in 2020, not by 6–7 million; retail rises from 15 to 16 million in the final period, not by 4 million; and agriculture remains at about 3 million between 1980 and 2000. The explanation linking healthcare growth to COVID is unsupported by the graph. Focus on summarising the overall trends and comparing the sectors without adding causes.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has some organisation: it introduces the graph and then discusses each sector in separate paragraphs, so readers can generally follow the sequence. However, the progression is weakened by an introductory paragraph about the graph’s symbols, which takes space without helping summarise the data, and by the lack of a concise overview connecting the main trends. Linking is often repetitive, especially the repeated use of “then” and “and,” while the final sentence, “So, this is the detail,” adds little. The agriculture paragraph also ends with an unfinished thought: “as there were”. Group the information around the main rises and falls, use clearer comparisons between sectors, and ensure every paragraph and sentence is complete.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant basic terms such as “increased,” “decreased,” and “reached,” and the sector names make the subject clear. However, vocabulary is repetitive and sometimes imprecise, limiting the range available for describing trends. Phrases such as “had started from” and “kept increasing” are repeated, while “detail about the jobs” is vague and informal for an academic summary. “By 5 million” is also less precise than describing the change as a rise of 5 million. There are spelling and word-form slips, including “beacuse” and “agricultural sector” used where “agriculture” would be more natural. Build a small range of accurate trend verbs and comparison phrases, and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, and most of the data descriptions remain understandable. However, sentence patterns are repetitive, and some longer constructions are awkward or incomplete. For example, “The jobs in agricultural sector had decreased gradually as there were” is unfinished, while “The manufacturing sector has circle” omits an article and uses an unsuitable verb form. There are also agreement and article problems in “The number of jobs are” and “in the four sectors of economy.” Tense choices such as “had started” are used repeatedly where simple past would describe the chart more naturally. Practise complete sentences with accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, and consistent past-tense reporting; use a few varied structures without making them unnecessarily long.

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