Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph tracks the information of number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in a particular period of time 1960 to 2020 in a specific nation.
Overall, when the number of jobs are increasing in all the other sectors, in agriculture sector jobs are quite delining ,in 1960.
The apparent information given in the graph is that in 1960,2,6,6and 15 was the number of jobs in millions in healthcare,agriculture,retail and manufacturing sector, respectively. Whereas,oscillate 1960 and 2000, growth in number of jobs in retail sector edge up, increase by approximately 10%. After 1980, employment in manufacturing sector declines drametically and surpass with retail and healthcare sector between 2000 and 2020. Healthcare sector intersect with agriculture sector in between 1960 and 1980 and again surpass manufacturing sector in oscillate 2000 and 2020 and then meet with the number of job in retail sector, after 10 years. It is astonishing to note that jobs in healthcare sector substaintially increase whole in other sectors either number of people umemployed was rising or they was slowly growing.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify the four sectors and include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million jobs in 1960 and healthcare at 2 million. You also notice the broad decline in agriculture and the later growth of healthcare. However, the overview is unclear and partly inaccurate: “jobs are increasing in all the other sectors” overlooks manufacturing’s fall after 1980, and the claim that healthcare surpasses manufacturing between 2000 and 2020 is not supported—the two are about 11 and 17 million in 2000, then 16 and 13 million in 2020. Some comparisons and trends are difficult to interpret. Give a concise, accurate overview first, then select key changes and support them with clear figures.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response has an opening, an attempted overview, and a paragraph of details, so there is some basic organisation. However, the progression is difficult to follow because several trends are crowded into one long paragraph and the sequence of comparisons is unclear. For example, “Healthcare sector intersect with agriculture sector … and again surpass manufacturing sector” combines separate events without clearly identifying when they occur. Linking words such as “Whereas” and “After” are used, but some connections do not express the intended relationship accurately. Organise the report around an overview followed by clear comparisons, and use one sentence for each major trend or time period. This will make the information easier to track.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You attempt a range of trend vocabulary, including “declines,” “edge up,” “intersect,” and “substantially increase,” and the reader can generally identify the sectors being discussed. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or awkward, as in “tracks the information of number of jobs,” “oscillate 1960 and 2000,” and “number of people unemployed was rising.” Several spelling errors, including “delining,” “drametically,” and “substaintially,” also reduce precision. Some expressions appear to describe the graph but do not convey a clear trend. Use standard reporting phrases such as “the number of jobs,” “between 1960 and 2000,” “rose steadily,” and “fell sharply,” and check spelling before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “when,” “whereas,” and “after.” However, complex constructions are frequently faulty, and errors sometimes make the intended comparison hard to understand. Examples include “when the number of jobs are increasing,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “in 1960, … was the number of jobs,” which has an awkward sentence structure. Articles, plurals, and punctuation are also inconsistently controlled, as in “in healthcare, agriculture, retail and manufacturing sector” and the missing spaces after commas. Build accurate short sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses. Check subject–verb agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.
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