Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph gives the information about number of jobs in the four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020
Overall,In 1960,manufacturing sector had the highest number of employment till 2000 and the least was healthcare which eventually had a rapid increase and became the highest and equal to retail in 2020.
Giving a keen glance to the line graph it shares that manufacturing had the highest number of employment till 2000 and had s slight decrease in 2020 whereas retail had increased gradually and intersected healthcare in 2020.Talking about healthcare, it had the least number of 3 millliononly and had increased slightly till 1980 but in 1980 healthcare had a rapid growth upto 15 from 1980 to 2020.In 1960 agriculture had employment of 5 million and had decreased slightly and remained to be the lowest sector to have employment among all the four sectors of the economy.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing starts highest and later declines, while healthcare and retail rise, and agriculture remains the smallest sector. However, several details are inaccurate or unclear. Manufacturing is highest only through 1980, not until 2000, when retail is lower than manufacturing but healthcare is also below it; by 2020, retail and healthcare are tied at about 16 million. Healthcare begins at about 2 million, not 3 million, and rises to about 16 million, rather than 15. Agriculture starts at about 6 million, not 5. The response is also 10 words below the 150-word minimum. Add a concise overview and report the key figures accurately to address the task more fully.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
There is a basic paragraph structure, with an opening, an overview and a detail paragraph, and the response generally follows the chart’s timeline. However, progression within the detail paragraph is difficult to follow because several sectors and periods are combined in long sentences. For example, the sentence beginning “Giving a keen glance” moves from manufacturing to retail and then healthcare without clearly separating their trends. Linking is also repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “and,” while “Talking about healthcare” is an informal transition. Use one paragraph for the overview and organise the details into clearer comparisons, such as rising sectors versus declining sectors, with accurate time references.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “rapid increase,” “decrease,” “gradually,” and “remained,” so the reader can recognise the intended comparisons. However, the range is limited and several expressions are awkward or imprecise for an academic report. “Number of employment” is not a natural collocation; use “number of jobs” or “employment levels.” “Giving a keen glance” and “it shares that” are also unsuitable formulations. There are noticeable spelling and spacing problems, such as “millliononly” and “sight” where “slight” is intended. Aim for precise chart language and check spelling and word forms before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts both simple and more extended sentences, and the main message is usually understandable. However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often poorly controlled. The opening lacks a full stop, and the overview has faulty punctuation and spacing: “Overall,In 1960,manufacturing…” The phrase “manufacturing sector had the highest number of employment” also has problems with article use and sentence construction. In “it had the least number of 3 millliononly,” the structure is incomplete, and the later clause about growth “in 1980” does not clearly express the period being described. Use shorter, complete sentences, maintain consistent past tense, and check commas, articles and sentence boundaries.
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