Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There is a line graph which shows the number of four jobs of economy in us from the time period of 1960 to 2020.in this graph we have jobs number of manufacturing,retail,agriculture and healthcare.in the given time period the number of jobs healthcare and retail increases , on the other side the number of jobs of manufacture and agriculture decreases.

in the year 1960 the number of jobs of healthcae is between 0 to 5 millions however in next years till 2020 the jobs increases every year like in 1980 the number of jobs was 5 million in 2000 up then 10 million and in 2020 its bit up then 15 million rather then this the number of job in agriculture decreases every year like in 1960 the number of jobs was up then 5 million and next years it face sudden downfall like in 2000 the number of job are less then 5 million and in 2020 number of jobs are bwtween 0 to 5

bsides these two jobs other to jobs like retail and manufacture boyh have similar ups and down like these the number of jobs of retail increase in in 1960 its bit up then 5 and in 2020 the number of jobs are up then 15 million however manufacture have great number of job in 1960 but it decreses in 1960 its number is 15 million and in 2020 its number is less then 15

in conclucion the number of jobs in retail and healthcar increses and number of job in agriculture and manufacture decreases in time period of 1960 to 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview: healthcare and retail rise, while agriculture and manufacturing fall overall. Some figures support this, such as healthcare reaching about 16 million and agriculture ending at around 2 million. However, several key comparisons are missing or unclear. Manufacturing actually rises from 15 million to a peak of 20 million in 1980 before declining, and retail grows from 6 million to about 16 million; these important patterns are not accurately described. The claim that manufacturing decreases “in 1960” is confusing, and the overview does not mention that retail and healthcare finish at roughly the same level. Select the main turning points and compare the sectors more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic overall structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details and a concluding sentence. You also attempt to group healthcare with agriculture, then retail with manufacturing. However, progression within these paragraphs is difficult to follow: the manufacturing account shifts between years unclearly, and phrases such as “besides these two jobs other to jobs” make the relationship between ideas hard to track. Linking expressions such as “on the other side” and “however” are used, but connections are sometimes inaccurate or repetitive. Use clearer paragraphing, describe each sector in chronological order, and use comparisons to guide the reader rather than repeating the overview in the conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “number of jobs,” “increases,” “decreases,” and “downfall,” so the general subject is understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are imprecise or unnatural, such as “four jobs of economy,” “great number of job,” and “bit up then 15.” Repetition of “number of jobs” also makes the report less precise. Spelling errors—including “healthcae,” “manufacture,” “decreses,” and “conclucion”—are noticeable and sometimes slow the reader. Build a small set of accurate graph-reporting expressions, such as “rose steadily,” “peaked at,” and “fell to,” and check sector names and common words carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including comparisons introduced by “however” and “on the other side.” Nevertheless, the longer structures are often difficult to control, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “in 2000 up then 10 million” lacks a clear verb and comparison, while “the number of job are” has subject–verb disagreement. Tense and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent, as in “in 1960 its number is 15 million and in 2020 its number is less then 15.” Use complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, keep past-tense reporting consistent, and punctuate each comparison separately.

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