Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Jobs in manufacturing and agriculture decrease over the period, while retail and healthcare rose. In early 90s manufacturing demand was on its peak , whereas healthcare was in the bottom relatively. In 2020, healthcare and retail jobs overcome the demand of manufacturing.

Manufacturing and health were the two extreme in 1960. Jobs in manufacturing were the highest relatively around 15 in million, whereas healthcare was around 2.5 in million. However, in 1980 healthcare and manufacturing rose to 5 in million and 20 in million respectively. From this year manufacturing jobs started to decline, whereas healthcare begin to rose. Manufacturing start to fell from 20 to around 16 in million in 2000. Healthcare on the other side rose to around 11 in million in the same year. In 2020, healthcare increased to 16 and manufacturing decreased to 14 in million.

The remaining two were the retail and agriculture. They both started from 5.5 job in million in 1960 but they followed opposite direction from 1960 to 2020. Retail rose from 5 to 16 in million, whereas agriculture decline form 5.5 to 2 in million over the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall contrast: manufacturing and agriculture decline, while retail and healthcare rise, and you note that healthcare and retail finish ahead of manufacturing. The report also includes relevant figures at several points, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 and healthcare rising to 16 million by 2020. This gives the reader a generally accurate account of the graph. Some details, however, are unclear or imprecise: manufacturing peaks in 1980, not the “early 90s,” and the graph only provides data for 1960, 1980, 2000 and 2020. The overview could also better highlight that retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million in 2020, while agriculture remains the smallest sector. More precise selection and comparison of these features would strengthen the summary.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs grouping manufacturing with healthcare and retail with agriculture. This grouping helps the reader follow the main trends, and linking expressions such as “whereas,” “however” and “on the other side” show an effort to compare series. Some connections are less clear or repetitive, particularly the repeated “in 2020” references and the transition “The remaining two were the retail and agriculture.” The sequence “From this year” is also not fully precise about which year is meant. To move further, make references and transitions more exact, and organise each paragraph around a clear comparison across the same dates rather than narrating each line in turn.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “illustrates,” “over the period,” “decline” and “increased,” and the reader can generally understand the trends you describe. There is some variety in how you express change, but several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “manufacturing demand was on its peak,” “jobs overcome the demand,” and “the two extreme.” These phrases make parts of the report less precise. There are also spelling errors, including “form” for “from,” and inconsistent use of “job/jobs.” Aim for standard trend language and accurate collocations, for example, “reached a peak,” “exceeded the figure for,” and “the highest and lowest figures.” This would make your descriptions clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including comparisons with “whereas” and clauses beginning with “From this year.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but some grammatical errors recur. Examples include “healthcare begin to rose,” “Manufacturing start to fell,” and “agriculture decline,” where the verb forms do not match the past-time reporting. There are also article, number and preposition problems in phrases such as “in United States” and “15 in million.” Capitalisation and spacing around punctuation are inconsistent as well. Use the past simple consistently for the historical data, check subject–verb agreement, and practise standard forms such as “15 million jobs” and “in the United States.” These corrections would improve accuracy while retaining your sentence variety.

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