Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph below gives the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall two sectors of jobs in US had a rise while two sectors faced a decrease.Retail and Healthcare sector were at lowest but throughout time they had an increase leading the chart.Whereas Manufacturing and Agriculture sector had a dramatic decrease making them lowest n the chart.

As per the year 1960,Manufacturing sector had 15 million jobs but throughout time that number increased to 20 million by 1980 and later that number decreaded to 13 million by 2020.While Reatial started with 6 million jobs in 1960 and then had an increased which made it reach to 16 million jobs by 2020.

Agriculture sector started with 6 million jobs by1960 and that number decreased as years passed by and by 2020 it got to 2.5 million jobs making it the lowest on the chart.whereas health care started with bottom on chart at just 2.5 million jobs on the chart but later on it had a dramatic increaded making it the most increased job sector by 2020 at 16 million jobs .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several key movements, including manufacturing’s rise to 20 million in 1980 followed by a fall, and the growth of retail and healthcare. However, the overview is not fully accurate: retail and healthcare did not start as the lowest sectors together, and manufacturing did not decrease throughout the period. By 2020, retail and healthcare were joint highest at about 16 million, while agriculture was lowest. Some figures are also imprecise: manufacturing was about 17 million in 2000, and agriculture about 2 million in 2020. To strengthen the response, give a clearer overview of the contrasting trends and compare the sectors’ positions at the beginning and end.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic structure, with an introduction, an overview and paragraphs describing the data. The sequence from 1960 to 2020 is generally understandable, and linking words such as “Overall,” “Whereas” and “later on” help show contrast and time. However, progression is weakened by unclear or repetitive connections: the overview’s contrast between the sectors is difficult to follow, and several sentences join multiple trends without clear punctuation. The final paragraph also combines agriculture and healthcare in a long sentence, making the comparison less easy to track. Use one paragraph for the overview and organise the details into clear comparisons, with accurate sentence boundaries and references.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased,” “decreased,” “dramatic” and “leading the chart,” so the main information is usually understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are awkward or imprecise, such as “two sectors of jobs … had a rise,” “started with bottom on chart,” and “most increased job sector.” Repetition of “number,” “jobs” and “chart” also limits variety. Spelling errors such as “decreaded” and “Reatial” are noticeable and reduce accuracy. Aim for precise trend language and natural collocations, for example, “employment rose,” “reached a peak,” and “had the fewest jobs.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses linked with “while” and “whereas,” but complex structures are often faulty and errors occur frequently. Examples include “Retail and Healthcare sector were,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “that number increased to 20 million … and later that number decreased,” which needs clearer clause structure and punctuation. Missing spaces after commas and full stops, as in “1960,Manufacturing” and “decrease.Retail,” also make the writing harder to read. Articles and sentence patterns are sometimes incomplete, as in “started with bottom on chart.” Practise accurate past-tense reporting and build shorter, correctly punctuated comparisons before extending sentences.

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