Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph depicts the various employement options available in four sectors of United Nation.

Overall, it is crystal clear that manufacturing had been popular in initial years whereas agriculture was the least adopted profession.

Taking a quick glance, it is vividly clear that, manufacturing was heighest in the intital year which was 15 million jobs and touch its peak in 1980, then followed downward trend and remained only about 13 million by the end of the period. Whereas, retail sector followed the upward trend and reached its height from 5.2 million jobs in 1960 to 15.2 million jobs in 2020.

Moving further to the rest of the information, healthcare sector was the lowest during the first year and with gradual increase it surpassed manufacturing and became almost similar to retail sector. On the other hand, agriculture sector was lowest among the three which was 5.2 million in 1960 and dropped to only 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak before declining, retail and healthcare grow, and agriculture falls to the lowest level. The overview also correctly highlights manufacturing’s early prominence and agriculture’s low employment. However, some comparisons are incomplete or inaccurate. Retail starts at about 6 million, not 5.2 million, and reaches about 16 million in 2020; healthcare also reaches about 16 million, rather than clearly surpassing manufacturing as your wording suggests. The statement that healthcare “became almost similar to retail” would be more precise if you noted that both end at roughly the same level. Develop the overview around these key end-point comparisons and report the main figures consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the trends. The information generally progresses from manufacturing and retail to healthcare and agriculture, and linking phrases such as “On the other hand” help signal contrast. This meets the lower-band expectation of a coherent overall response and shows some ability to organise related details together. To make the progression more controlled, avoid formulaic transitions such as “Taking a quick glance” and “Moving further to the rest of the information,” and group the sectors by their trends or compare them directly at key years. The final paragraph’s “rest of the information” is also a vague reference; name the sectors being discussed.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “peak,” “downward trend,” “gradual increase,” and “dropped,” so the reader can understand the main movements. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unsuitable for describing a graph. “Employement options” and “profession” do not precisely describe the number of jobs in economic sectors, while “adopted” is not natural for employment levels. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “heighest” and “intital,” and “crystal clear” is overly conversational for an academic report. Choose precise terms such as “employment,” “sector,” “rose,” and “declined,” and check spelling and register.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of sentence forms, including clauses linked with “whereas” and “which,” and the overall meaning is usually clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in verb forms and sentence construction. For example, “manufacturing … touch its peak” needs a past-tense verb (“touched”), and “retail sector followed the upward trend and reached its height from … to …” does not form a clear comparison. The sentence beginning “Whereas, retail sector…” is also a fragment when separated from the preceding sentence, and commas are sometimes placed incorrectly after introductory phrases. Aim to make each sentence complete, use consistent past-tense reporting, and check articles and punctuation when joining contrasting trends.

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