Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates about the number of works in four phases of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. Overall,retail and healthcare have seen an upward trend throughout all years while agriculture and manufacturing have seen downward trend.

From first year till 1980,manufacturing has seen an upward trend and which arose from fifteen million jobs to 20 million respectively.After this, an downward trend can be seen till last year. In 1960,retail jobs were limited and has seen upgoing trend till last year.Agriculutre also has seen down going value from 1960 and stayed constant between 1980 and 2000 and afterwards, it has seen a downgrade. Retail and healthcare were gone upward in all years.Healthcare jobs and retail has been increased from very first year untill last year. Healthcare arose from less than five million jobs to almost sixteen miliion jobs and retail arose from 6 million and ended in 16 million jobs.

In summary, manufacturing seen upward trend for few years and then constant downward trend till last year and healthcare and retail had been increased throughout all the time.Agriculture was gone downward in all tenure.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main broad patterns and include relevant figures: manufacturing rises from 15 million to 20 million by 1980 before declining, while healthcare grows to about 16 million. You also note agriculture’s fall and its stability from 1980 to 2000. This gives the report a clear overview and covers the four sectors. However, the overview contains a significant inaccuracy: retail does not rise throughout the period, since it reaches 10 million in 1980 and 15 million in 2000, then increases only slightly to 16 million. Manufacturing also rises initially, so describing both manufacturing and agriculture as having a downward trend overall is too broad. To strengthen the response, make the overview more precise and compare the endpoint leaders: retail and healthcare both finish at about 16 million.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an identifiable introduction, overview, and body discussion, and it generally moves through the years in a sensible order. However, progression is weakened by repetition and by ideas being revisited rather than developed. For example, retail and healthcare’s growth is described several times, including “Retail and healthcare were gone upward” and the later sentence beginning “Healthcare jobs and retail…”. The final paragraph repeats earlier trends instead of adding a concise synthesis. Linking phrases such as “After this” and “afterwards” help show sequence, but some connections are awkward, and punctuation spacing makes the text harder to follow. Group the sectors by contrasting trends, use each paragraph for a distinct purpose, and avoid repeating the same comparison.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “upward trend,” “downward trend,” “constant,” and “jobs,” so the reader can understand the general direction of change. However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “number of works,” “four phases,” “upgoing trend,” “downgrade,” and “were gone upward.” Repetition of “trend” and “arose” also limits precision. Spelling errors such as “Agriculutre” and “miliion” further reduce control. Choose standard terms for describing data and vary them carefully: for example, say that a figure “increased,” “declined,” or “remained stable.” Accurate, natural collocations would make the comparisons clearer and more appropriate for an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and more extended sentences, and the main trends are usually understandable. However, errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Examples include “retail and healthcare have seen an upward trend” followed by “agriculture and manufacturing have seen downward trend,” where the article is missing, and “manufacturing has seen an upward trend and which arose,” which combines clauses incorrectly. There are also inconsistent forms in “retail jobs were limited and has seen” and “Healthcare jobs and retail has been increased.” These patterns make some sentences difficult to process. Practise forming clear subject–verb structures and use consistent past-tense reporting for the historical data; then check articles and agreement when editing.

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