Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph reflects the data of job market in various sectors more than 50 decades

in united states in which some of the sectors shows significant growth and statisfying results of employes with rises in jobs and employment quality while other have a huge recession and poor market quality with fall of interest

From 1960 to 2020 Manufacturing industry shows a decline but touching its all time peak in 1980s indicating the rise of productions of products and raw materials in that decade

While Retailers and and Healthcare business touched a rise in job production without even facing a minor recession over the few decades this reflects the fact that these industries have impactfull careers and wide range of growth opportunities in USA

However a surprising dow trend in the job market of Agricultural sector reflects a fall of farmers and production quanity of natural goods and its negative impacts on the nature as well on the total exports of the USA

Consquently the overall job market has major opportunities and setbacks based career choices and uncertain conditions in market range as per fact that individuals from usa must shift themselves from manufacturing and agriculture industry to sustain and live a better life or deal with issues being in the market on the other hand retail and healthcare business have a huge demand in the market and have a lasting impact can benefit a better career

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad directions of change: manufacturing peaks around 1980 and then declines, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture falls. These are relevant main features. However, the response does not clearly summarise the graph’s key comparisons or give figures, so the reader cannot see how the sectors compare at the start and end. Some claims also go beyond the data: the graph does not show employment quality, career opportunities, exports, environmental effects, or reasons people should change careers. Healthcare and retail rise overall, but describing them as having no downturn is not supported by the information provided. Focus on the four series, their approximate values and relative rankings, and give a concise overview grounded only in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some organisation: the response moves from a general opening to manufacturing, retail and healthcare, agriculture, and a concluding statement. This gives the reader a basic sense of the topics being discussed. However, there is no clear progression through the data, and the final paragraph shifts into advice about career choices rather than completing the comparison. Several sentences are very long and combine multiple claims, while connectors such as “While,” “However,” and “on the other hand” do not always make the relationships between ideas clear. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and grouped trends, and connect each point explicitly to the relevant years and sectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “decline,” “peak,” “recession,” and “demand,” and some choices communicate the general direction of change. However, vocabulary is often imprecise or unnatural for describing a graph. Phrases such as “satisfying results of employees,” “job production,” “impactfull careers,” and “market range” obscure the intended meaning, while “more than 50 decades” does not accurately express the period shown. Spelling errors, including “statisfying,” “quan ity” (quantity), and “Consquently,” also reduce clarity. Prefer direct, standard trend language and use terms such as “number of jobs,” “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable” accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt longer sentences and subordinate clauses, for example, “While Retailers and and Healthcare business touched a rise …,” but these structures are often faulty, and the response relies heavily on long, loosely connected sentences. There are recurring problems with agreement and sentence construction: “some of the sectors shows,” “other have,” and “Retailers and and Healthcare business touched” do not form accurate grammatical patterns. Missing or inconsistent articles and punctuation also make sentence boundaries difficult to follow, particularly in the opening and conclusion. Build control with shorter sentences first, then add one clear complex structure where useful. Check subject–verb agreement, singular and plural forms, and punctuation before submitting.

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