Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates about the United State job markets in variour category such as manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Manufacturing job sectors have the highest proportions of jobs. Whereas, Agriculture sectors have the least number of jobs.

After analysing the graph, it is cystal clear that Manufacturing has the highest job market which started from 15 millions of jobs in 1960. This sector continuously grow for next 20 years after that it shows downward trend from 20 millions of jobs till 14 millions jobs in 2020. Furthermore, Retail and agriculture jobs market initiate from 6 millions and 3 millions jobs respectively. In the coming year they increased parallelly at meet at 16 millions jobs in 2020.

Moreover, the number of jobs in agriculture sectors of the United State begins from 6 millions of jobs market. However, In further year it constantly falls and reached at 1 millions jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the four sectors and give some relevant figures, including manufacturing’s rise to 20 million before declining and agriculture’s overall fall. However, the overview is inaccurate: manufacturing was not the largest sector throughout, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, above manufacturing at roughly 13 million. The account also confuses agriculture’s starting point: it began at about 6 million, not 3 million, and the final figure was around 2 million rather than 1 million. Healthcare, a major rising trend, is not described at all. These omissions and misreadings mean the main features are only minimally reported. Compare all four trends accurately and make the overview reflect the changing rankings.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs, and signposts such as “Overall,” “Furthermore” and “Moreover” help indicate the direction of the discussion. However, progression is not consistently clear. The overview claims manufacturing remains highest, while the later figures show it declining and do not explain the final comparison. The sentence about retail and agriculture increasing “parallelly” is difficult to follow and conflicts with the stated fall in agriculture. Repetition of “jobs market” also makes the links between points less effective. Organise the details by clear trends—such as rising sectors and declining sectors—and use comparisons that accurately connect the figures.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “downward trend,” “increased” and “falls,” and the reader can generally identify the sectors being discussed. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “highest proportions of jobs,” “job market” for the number of jobs, and “increased parallelly at meet.” There are also spelling errors, including “variour” and “cystal,” which reduce precision. Aim for standard chart language and use it consistently: for example, describe the number of jobs as “employment” or “job numbers,” and say that two sectors “both reached” a figure rather than that they met at it.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use time clauses, for example, “This sector continuously grow for next 20 years after that it shows downward trend.” However, the sentence structures are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, articles, plurals and sentence boundaries can make the meaning harder to follow. Examples include “Manufacturing job sectors have,” “This sector … grow,” and “reached at 1 millions jobs.” The sentence beginning “Furthermore” also joins several ideas without clear grammatical links. Practise forming accurate comparisons and past-tense descriptions, such as “Manufacturing employment rose to 20 million in 1980, then fell to about 13 million by 2020.” Clearer punctuation and shorter, controlled sentences would improve accuracy.

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