Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illstrated the information about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US among 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the number of job in retail and healthcare dramatically rose from 5 millions to 15 million and 3 millions to 15 million respectly in 1960 to 2020 . While in the manufacturing and agriculture delined from 15 millions to 13 million and 6 millions to 3 million respectly in 1960 to 2020.

Firstly, the number of jobs in healthcare and retail are very lower in 1960 as show in the line ghraph , little bit increased in 1980 and gradully grow up to 15 millions in 2020. This was a hug changed in the number of job in the sectors of healthcare and retail.

Secondly, number of jobs in manufacturing sector was morgenly , increased to 20 millions in 1980. After the a major delined in the manufacturing sector. And also a major delined in the number of jobs in agriculture sector from 5 millions to 3 millions from 1960 to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad contrast between rising employment in retail and healthcare and falling employment in manufacturing and agriculture, and you include an overview. However, several figures and trends are inaccurate: retail starts at 6 million, not 5, and reaches 16 million, while healthcare rises from 2 to 16 million rather than from 3 to 15. Agriculture falls to 2 million by 2020, not 3. The account also says retail and healthcare increased only “a little bit” by 1980, although retail had reached 10 million and healthcare 5 million. The main features are relevant, but these errors and the limited detail make the summary only partially complete. Check each series against the graph and report the key turning points more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs beginning “Firstly” and “Secondly.” This gives the reader some organisation, and the comparison between rising and declining sectors is a useful basis for grouping information. However, progression within the paragraphs is not always clear. The first detail paragraph combines healthcare and retail without consistently distinguishing their figures, while the final paragraph moves from manufacturing to agriculture with little development. Linking phrases such as “After the” and “And also” are awkward or repetitive, and some sentence fragments interrupt the flow. Group the sectors consistently and connect each trend to its dates and values so the sequence is easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “rose,” “increased,” and “declined,” and you attempt to vary your wording with “dramatically” and “gradually.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, spelling, and collocation errors make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “a hug changed,” “morgenly,” “delined,” and “line ghraph”; “number of job” is also an inaccurate form. Repeated use of “number of jobs” and “sector” further limits flexibility. Build a small set of accurate trend expressions and practise their natural combinations, such as “employment rose steadily” or “experienced a sharp decline.” Proofreading spelling and word forms would also make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including a contrast introduced by “While” and a time clause with “from 1960 to 2020.” However, sentence structures are often faulty, and errors frequently affect clarity. For example, “the number of job in retail and healthcare … rose” has agreement and number problems, while “in 1960 as show in the line” lacks a correctly formed verb. The sentence beginning “While in the manufacturing…” is incomplete, and “After the a major…” is also a fragment. Articles, plurals, verb forms, and punctuation are inconsistent. Practise complete subject–verb sentences first, then join related ideas with accurate clauses such as “whereas” or “while.”

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