Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates, overall number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020. At the top of list, Manufacturing holds the biggest figures in the job, on the contrast, Agriculture holds the lowest number of job. Overall, Manufacturing shows a significant growth from 15 million to 20 million, since 1960 t0 1980, furthermore it fell substantially since 2000 to 2020. On the other hand, Agriculture holds nearly 5 million in 1960, beside that it fell to 3 million by 1980, as well as, it remained stable untill 2000, furthermore, it fell to 2 million by the end of 2020. Whereas, Retail rose from 5 to 15 million, since 1960 to 2000, moreover, it remaind stable. Likewise, the healthcare sector rose substantially from 2 million to 5 million, since 1960 to 1980, additionally, it surged sharply from 5 million to 15 million, since 1980 to 2020. Overall, Retail as well as Healthcare remains the biggest holder among the four, additionaly both holds around 15 millions jobs in the sector of the economy in the US.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several key movements, including manufacturing’s rise to 20 million in 1980 and subsequent decline, and agriculture’s overall fall. However, some figures and comparisons are inaccurate: agriculture starts at about 6 million, not “nearly 5 million”; retail reaches about 16 million in 2020 rather than remaining stable after 2000; and healthcare rises to about 11 million in 2000, not 15 million by 2020. The overview also says manufacturing is the largest throughout, although retail and healthcare catch up by the end. These omissions and misreadings make the summary only partly accurate. A clearer overview of the changing rankings, supported by accurate endpoint figures, would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response includes an opening, an overview, and descriptions of all four sectors, so the reader can identify the main subject and follow the broad sequence from 1960 to 2020. However, the information is presented in one continuous paragraph, and the progression between sectors is not always clear. Linking expressions such as “furthermore,” “moreover,” “additionally,” and “likewise” are used repeatedly, sometimes where the relationship between ideas is not logical. For example, “Whereas, Retail…” does not clearly contrast with the preceding point. Grouping the overview separately and then comparing related trends—such as the rising retail and healthcare figures—would create a clearer progression and reduce mechanical linking.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary to describe trends, including “rose,” “fell substantially,” “remained stable,” and “surged sharply.” These choices show awareness of the language needed for a graph, but several phrases are unnatural or imprecise, such as “holds the biggest figures in the job,” “on the contrast,” and “biggest holder.” Repetition of “holds” and “substantially” also limits flexibility. There are noticeable spelling errors, including “untill,” “remaind,” and “additionaly,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for standard collocations such as “the number of jobs,” “the highest figure,” and “in contrast,” and check spelling carefully. More precise trend vocabulary would help make comparisons clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt complex sentences using time clauses and linking phrases, but control is inconsistent, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences awkward. The opening, “The graph illustrates, overall number of jobs,” is missing an article or a suitable clause structure. There are also problems with prepositions and time expressions in “between 1960 to 2020” and “since 1960 to 1980.” Agreement is inconsistent in “Retail as well as Healthcare remains” and “both holds.” Punctuation around introductory connectors is also often faulty, as in “Whereas, Retail…” and “as well as, it remained stable.” Use simpler, complete sentence patterns first, then check articles, agreement, and consistent past-tense reporting.

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