Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the proportion of number of jobs in four sectors of economy in the Nation US over a time period of 60 years between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that number of jobs in the fields of retail and healthcare increased steadily throughout the period, With helathcare experiencing the most significant growth. In contrast, manufacturing showed downward trend after reaching in its peak. while agriculture saw a continuous downward trend and remained the smallest employment sector.

Looking at the details, the two sectors experienced growth , namely retail and healthcare. The number of jobs in retail starting from 6 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020. while the healthcare sector starts from 2 million to 16 million in 2020 . In stark contrast, the agriculture sector starts from 6 million and it sharply declined 2 million in 1980, After that it remained relatively stable during the period of 1980 and 2000. Before falling to 1 million in 2020.

Turning to the remaining categories, Healthcare showed the most significant growth, starting at roughly 2 million jobs in 1960 , the figure climbed to 5 million in 1980 and approximately 11 million in 2000. By comparison agriculture fell from 6 million in 1960 to 3 million in 1980.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main contrast between the growing retail and healthcare sectors and the declining agriculture sector, and your overview also notes manufacturing’s fall after its peak. However, several details are inaccurate or incomplete: agriculture falls to about 3 million by 1980, not 2 million, and remains at roughly 3 million in 2000 before reaching 2 million in 2020, rather than 1 million. Manufacturing is mentioned in the overview but its figures and later decline are not described in the detail paragraphs. The final paragraph repeats healthcare and agriculture information instead of covering manufacturing. These gaps and misread figures make the report only partially complete, despite relevant overall observations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, an overview and detail paragraphs, so the reader can recognise a basic report structure. The overview usefully groups the rising sectors against the declining ones. However, progression is weakened because the second detail paragraph repeats healthcare and agriculture rather than introducing the missing manufacturing trend. Some links are also awkward or incorrectly punctuated: “while” begins a sentence after a full stop, and “Turning to the remaining categories” does not accurately signal what follows. The repeated references to agriculture and healthcare make the organisation feel circular. Group the sectors once, then describe each trend in a clear sequence, using linking phrases that accurately show contrast or continuation.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary for a graph, including “increased steadily,” “downward trend,” “peak,” “sharply declined” and “relatively stable.” These choices help communicate the broad movements. However, some expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “proportion of number of jobs” and “in the Nation US”; the graph reports numbers, not proportions. Spelling errors such as “helathcare” and awkward phrasing such as “the number of jobs in retail starting from” also reduce precision. Aim for concise, conventional chart language and check spelling carefully. For example, “the number of jobs in retail rose from” is clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex forms, including contrast clauses and participial descriptions, and the main trends are generally understandable. However, errors occur often enough to make some sentences awkward. For example, “The number of jobs in retail starting from 6 million” is a sentence fragment; use “The number of jobs in retail rose from 6 million.” Tense and agreement are inconsistent in “the healthcare sector starts” and “the figure climbed,” while missing articles appear in “number of jobs” and “showed downward trend.” Capitalisation and punctuation also need attention, particularly the lower-case “while” after a full stop and the capitalised “After” mid-sentence. More consistently complete sentences and controlled past-tense reporting would improve accuracy.

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