Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrate the infomation about job vacancies in four sectors of finicial system in the US between 1960 and 2020. Overall, in Retail and Healthcare sectors the number of job vacancies reached at peak at the end of the period. Manufacturing sector is the top most sector giving job oppurtunities in the beginning but it shows a sharp decrease over the period and the number of jobs in agriculture sector gradually decrease over the given period and at lowest in the end.

In 1960, manufacturing industries giving highest job oppurtunities it was at 15 millions that is much higher than others and show a significantly rose in 1980 and reached at 20 millions but then sharply decrease and in 2020 it reached at 13 millions. And the agriculture sector giving 6 millions jobs in 1960 and than gradually fell to 3 millions in 1980 and at the end at 2 millions.

Consequently, the retail and agriculture sector were at lowest in 1960. The numbers of job in retail sector was about 6 million that is a bit higher than agriclture industry, the retail industry show a significantly rose and reached at 15 million in 2000 and at the end of period at 16 million. Agriculture sector was at lowest in the beginning and show a consistent increase over the period and reached at peaked in 2020 at 16 million taht is equal to retail industry.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify several important patterns: manufacturing is highest initially, rises to a peak in 1980 and then declines, while retail and healthcare grow and agriculture falls. However, the account is only partly accurate and does not cover all key information clearly. Most importantly, the final paragraph incorrectly says agriculture rises to 16 million and equals retail; this is actually healthcare, while agriculture ends at about 2 million. The opening also describes the sectors as part of the “financial system,” which is not supported by the chart. Include a concise overview that accurately compares the main trends, and check each series carefully before reporting its figures. This would make the summary more complete and reliable.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, an overview and two body paragraphs, and it generally groups information by sector. This gives the reader some organisation. However, progression is weakened by unclear or inaccurate links between ideas. “Consequently” does not express the relationship between the preceding and following information, and the final paragraph shifts from retail to agriculture while mistakenly assigning healthcare’s trend to agriculture. Repeated use of “and” also makes several long sentences difficult to follow. Use clearer sequencing and comparison phrases, and keep each paragraph focused on accurately describing related trends. A more deliberate structure—overview followed by grouped comparisons—would make the information easier to track.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “reached,” “gradually fell,” “sharp decrease” and “over the period,” so the main trends are often understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes obscuring meaning. “Job vacancies” and “financial system” do not accurately describe the chart’s number of jobs in economic sectors, while “top most sector giving job opportunities” is awkward. There are also noticeable spelling errors, such as “infomation,” “finicial,” “oppurtunities” and “agriclture.” Prefer precise terms such as “number of jobs,” “sector” and “employment,” and check spelling and natural word combinations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, but control is inconsistent, and errors frequently affect readability. For example, “The line graph illustrate” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “manufacturing industries giving highest job opportunities” lacks a correctly formed main verb and article. Tense and verb forms are also unreliable in phrases such as “show a significantly rose” and “the retail industry show.” Several sentences run together through repeated “and,” with punctuation that does not clearly separate the ideas. Practise forming complete clauses with consistent past-tense verbs for the historical data, and check agreement, articles and sentence boundaries. Shorter, accurately controlled sentences would help communicate the comparisons.

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