Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs, in millions, in four sectors of the US economy (manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare) from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, employment in manufacturing was highest and healthcare offered the lowest. Employment in manufacturing rose at first and then declined, while agriculture fell over the period and is lowest in offering jobs by the end. In contrast, retail and healthcare showed a steady increase.

Manufacturing employment peaked in 1980 at around 20 million jobs and than droped to 17 million jobs by 2000 and eventually dropeed to 13 million by 2020. Agriculture, on the other hand, fell to approximately 3 million jobs in 1980 than remains stable till 2000 and then slighly declined to 2 million jobs by 2020.

Healthcare was the smallest contributor in 1960, but by 2020 it had risen to the highest level alongside retail which is 16 million jobs. Furthermore, Retail started with 6 million jobs in 1960 and now markets 16 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main overall patterns: manufacturing rises before falling, agriculture declines, and retail and healthcare grow. You also include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing reaching about 20 million in 1980 and healthcare and retail both reaching 16 million by 2020. However, the overview contains a key inaccuracy: manufacturing is not the highest-employment sector overall by 2020, and healthcare is not the lowest throughout; agriculture is lowest at the end, while healthcare starts lowest. The account also gives limited detail on retail’s steady rise and does not clearly compare the changing rankings across the period. A more precise overview and fuller coverage of the four series would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear four-paragraph structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about manufacturing and agriculture, then healthcare and retail. This gives the reader a generally coherent route through the information. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “In contrast,” and “on the other hand” help signal relationships, although some transitions feel mechanical and the final paragraph combines two series without developing their comparison. The phrase “than remains stable till 2000” also makes the sequence of events less smooth. To strengthen progression, group the sectors by contrasting trends and use clearer references when comparing their values, so each paragraph has a more focused purpose.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “employment,” “peaked,” “declined,” “stable,” and “contributor,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, some choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing the data: “healthcare offered the lowest” is unclear, and “now markets 16 million jobs” is not an appropriate collocation. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “droped,” “dropeed,” and “slighly,” which reduce the accuracy of the vocabulary. Aim for precise, conventional phrases such as “the number of jobs,” “stood at,” and “increased to,” and check spelling carefully. This would give you a more reliable range without sacrificing clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and more complex forms, including the contrast in “Manufacturing employment peaked … and then dropped” and the clause beginning “while agriculture fell.” Most of the intended meaning can be followed, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “agriculture fell … then remains stable” shifts inconsistently between past forms, and “fell … than remains” needs a clearer sequence such as “fell … and then remained.” The sentence “healthcare … had risen to the highest level alongside retail which is 16 million jobs” has an unclear clause structure and tense choice. Review past-tense consistency and build comparisons with complete, parallel clauses; this will improve accuracy while preserving your attempts at varied sentences.

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