Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This graph shows brief information regarding ups and downs in different job sectors. Jobs in healthcare were least during decade of 1960 as compare to other sectors which were on top with higher number of jobs.One thing which is very interesting is that the graph is showng a same peak for both of healthcaere and retail sectors althogh,the second one was producing higher numbers as compare to first one.

During 1960 to 1980 manufacturing sector was excessively producing higher number of jobs but after that maufacturing sector lower down its numbers. If we compare manufacturing sectors with healthcare and retail these two have made impressive peak in dacade of 2020.

. Agricuture sector was good at producing jobs as compare to healthcare in 1960 but its nubers gradually going during previous decades which is so much discusting.

From given data we can conclude that healthcare sector is commendable for increasing higher number of jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several relevant trends, including manufacturing’s rise to a peak before declining and healthcare’s overall growth. However, the response only minimally summarises the graph: it gives no accurate figures and does not clearly compare the four sectors across the period. The claim that retail produced higher numbers than healthcare at a “same peak” is misleading: they are equal at about 16 million in 2020, while retail is higher in 1980 and 2000. Agriculture did not perform better than healthcare in 1960; both were about 6 million. The overview focuses mainly on healthcare and misses the key shift from manufacturing dominance to retail and healthcare leading by 2020. Select the main trends and support them with accurate data comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is some attempt to group information by sector, and phrases such as “During 1960 to 1980” and “If we compare” signal relationships between ideas. However, the response lacks a clear overall progression: the opening mixes an overview with an inaccurate comparison, and the body moves between sectors without a consistent structure. The final sentence repeats the focus on healthcare rather than drawing together the main changes. Linking is also limited and sometimes unclear, as in “these two” and “the second one,” which make the comparisons harder to follow. Organise the report into a brief overview followed by paragraphs comparing related trends, and use clear references to each sector.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of trend vocabulary, including “gradually,” “increasing,” “peak,” and “lower down,” so the reader can generally identify the topic. However, word choice and spelling errors are frequent enough to make some descriptions awkward or unclear. Examples include “excessively producing,” “impressive peak,” and “commendable,” which are not natural or objective ways to describe employment data; “disgusting” is especially inappropriate in this context. There are also misspellings such as “healthcaere,” “maufacturing,” and “Agricuture.” Use precise, neutral terms for graph trends and check spelling carefully. Avoid evaluative language and choose collocations such as “the number of jobs rose” or “employment declined.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response includes some attempts at longer sentence structures, for example, “If we compare manufacturing sectors with healthcare and retail…” and “From given data we can conclude…”. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction, verb forms, articles, and punctuation sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. For instance, “the graph is showng a same peak” has an incorrect verb form and article, while “its nubers gradually going” lacks a finite verb. The opening also runs several ideas together without clear sentence boundaries. Practise accurate simple comparisons first, then build longer sentences using correct forms such as “the number of jobs gradually declined” and consistent past-tense reporting.

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