Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph provides the detail about the number of jobs in four sectors of the thrift in the US in the midle of 1960 and 2020.

Overall, all job sectors were experienced economy growth and falls during the time period 1960 between 2020 in US.

The biggest trend manufacturing 15 to 20 million in 1960 and 1980 was mayinally diminished 16 million in 2020. While healthcare was 2 million in 1960 did dramatically soar up approximately 17 million in 2020.

In contrast, retail is three times greater than agriculture. Retail rapidly enhance 5 million to approximately 16 million in 2020. In addition, retail and healthcare was almost equal in 2020. Agriculture was decline 5 million into 2 million respectally.

In general, healthcare and retail was gradually rise meanwhile; manufacturing steadily fall down but the agriculture was a lowest proportion of wealth in US.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify several relevant trends, including manufacturing peaking around 1980 and then declining, healthcare rising, and agriculture remaining the smallest sector. However, the overview is inaccurate: “all job sectors” did not experience both growth and falls, since retail rose throughout, while agriculture generally declined. Some figures are also misreported: manufacturing reached about 20 million in 1980, not 15 million, and retail began at about 6 million, not 5 million. The comparison that retail was three times agriculture is not consistently true across the period. The response contains 134 words, below the 150-word minimum, so the account is also too brief to develop the main comparisons fully. Include a precise overview and support it with accurate key figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has separate paragraphs for an introduction, overview and details, which gives it some basic organisation. You also use linking expressions such as “Overall,” “In contrast” and “In addition.” However, the progression is not consistently clear: the overview says all sectors had both growth and falls, then the later paragraphs describe different patterns without resolving that generalisation. Some links are awkward or do not show the intended relationship, as in “In contrast, retail is three times greater than agriculture.” The final paragraph repeats earlier trends rather than adding a clear concluding comparison. Organise the body around contrasting patterns—for example, rising sectors versus declining sectors—and use linking phrases only where their relationship is accurate.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of trend vocabulary, including “dramatically soar,” “rapidly enhance” and “steadily fall down,” and the reader can generally identify the sectors and direction of change. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “sectors of the thrift,” “mayinally diminished,” “retail rapidly enhance” and “lowest proportion of wealth.” Spelling errors, including “midle” and “respectally,” also make the report less precise. Some expressions describe jobs as wealth or use verbs that do not naturally fit employment figures. Choose standard graph-reporting language and check spelling: for example, say that a sector’s employment “rose,” “declined” or “remained stable,” and describe agriculture as having the fewest jobs.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use some simple sentences and attempt more complex forms, including “While healthcare was 2 million in 1960…” and a contrast with “meanwhile.” However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make relationships difficult to follow. Examples include “all job sectors were experienced,” “retail and healthcare was almost equal,” and “Agriculture was decline.” These show problems with verb forms, agreement and sentence construction. Time expressions are also awkwardly formed in “during the time period 1960 between 2020.” Aim first for accurate, complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, such as “Healthcare employment rose from 2 million in 1960 to about 16 million in 2020.” Then practise combining accurate clauses using “while” or “whereas.”

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