Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the provided information of US economy's four job sectors between 1960 and 2020. Overall, the most interesting information is mentioned that healthcare sector saw a massive growth over a period of time and became the most popular job in the US economy. Therefore, retail sector also saw a significant growth over the decades and reach to the equal level of healthcare sector and become the popular job sector.\
On the one hand, Manufacturing sector start with 15 million jobs and experience an increase during 1980 but after then, this sector face a decrease till 2020. Manufacturing industry become the mediocre job.
On the other hand, Agriculture sector experince the biggest downfall over the decades and became least popular job sector in the US economy.
In conclusion, Retail sector and healthcare saw a steady growth and become favourite job in the economy. And, the agriculture sector become least favourite job in the economy. but manfucaturing sector is still popular but not that much.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify the main broad trends: healthcare and retail rise, while agriculture declines, and manufacturing peaks before falling. The overview also notes that healthcare and retail finish at a similar level, which matches the chart. However, several key comparisons are missing or imprecise. Healthcare reaches about 16 million jobs in 2020, tying with retail, rather than clearly becoming the most popular sector; manufacturing remains substantial at about 13 million. The body gives only one figure for manufacturing and none for the other sectors, so the scale and timing of changes are not well demonstrated. Develop the overview with the final ranking and support each trend with selected figures, including retail’s steady rise and agriculture’s low, declining totals.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview, two body paragraphs and a concluding statement. The contrast signposts “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help separate manufacturing from agriculture. However, the progression is not consistently effective: the overview repeats ideas later in the conclusion, while retail and healthcare are not developed in a body paragraph despite being central trends. “Therefore” does not clearly express the relationship between the two overview claims, and beginning the conclusion with “And” makes the connection feel mechanical. Organise the body by grouping the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, and use linking phrases only where they clarify a comparison or sequence.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “growth,” “downfall,” “increase” and “decrease,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices are imprecise or unnatural for a statistical report. Phrases such as “most popular job,” “favourite job sector” and “mediocre job” describe preference or quality rather than employment totals. There are also spelling and word-form errors, including “experince” and “manfucaturing,” which reduce accuracy. Use neutral terms such as “number of jobs,” “employment” and “sector,” alongside precise trend language. For example, describe a sector as having the highest employment rather than being the most popular.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries are noticeable. Examples include “Manufacturing sector start” and “this sector face,” where the verbs do not agree with the subject, and “reach to the equal level,” where the sentence pattern is faulty. The opening overview sentence, “the most interesting information is mentioned that,” is also awkwardly constructed. Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, particularly in the final sentence, which begins “but” after a full stop. Check subject–verb agreement and past-tense consistency, and use shorter, complete sentences when a longer structure becomes difficult to control.
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