Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the changes in the number of jobs in four sector involving manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the figure for manufacturing declined significantly , while retail and healthcare sector showed an significant rise. by contrast the number of jobs in agriculture recorded the lowest value. by the end healthcare sector and retail became the highest figure.

In 1960, the figure for retail stood at justover 1 million compared to 15 millions for manufacturing sector. the number of jobs in retail sector rose to 15 million in 2000 before staying relatively stable

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview, noting manufacturing’s decline and the rise in retail and healthcare. However, the response only partially reports the graph: it ends before describing the later years, gives almost no figures for agriculture or healthcare, and does not explain the main comparisons across the full period. There is also a significant data error: retail was about 6 million in 1960, not “just over 1 million.” The overview’s claim that retail and healthcare became the highest by the end is broadly supported, but it needs accurate figures and clearer detail. The response is 48 words below the required minimum, which contributes to the limited coverage. Include the key start and end values and complete the account of all four trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph beginning to describe the data. This gives the reader a basic route through the information, and phrases such as “Overall” and “by contrast” signal relationships between points. However, the final paragraph stops after the retail trend in 2000, so the report has no complete progression through the remaining years or sectors. Some linking is also awkward: “by contrast” is separated into a new sentence without consistent capitalisation, and the overview combines several comparisons without developing them. Organise the details into a complete sequence, such as early-period figures followed by later changes, and use clear links to compare sectors. A concluding sentence is not essential, but all main trends need to be connected and reported.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “line graph,” “declined significantly,” “rose,” and “relatively stable,” and the sector names are appropriate. This shows a workable range for describing trends. However, some wording is imprecise or awkward, such as “the figure for manufacturing” and “became the highest figure”; “number of jobs” and “had the joint-highest totals” would be clearer. There are also noticeable spacing and word-form issues, including “justover” and “an significant.” Repetition of “figure” and “number of jobs” limits flexibility, while the incomplete report gives few opportunities to demonstrate a broader range. Aim for precise trend language and vary expressions such as “employment,” “stood at,” and “increased to.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more developed sentence forms, including the contrast in “Overall, the figure for manufacturing declined significantly, while…” This helps communicate the main direction of change. However, errors in agreement, articles, capitalisation, punctuation, and sentence completion are evident. For example, “four sector” should be plural, “an significant rise” has an article error, and “by contrast” should begin with a capital letter after a full stop. The final sentence is incomplete because it ends after “before staying relatively stable” without a full account or clear endpoint. There are also inconsistent spaces before punctuation. Use complete sentences, check singular and plural forms, and proofread articles and sentence boundaries. More accurate control of these basics would make your comparisons easier to follow.

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