Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The graph illustrates information related to the number of jobs in four different sectors of the US economy between the years 1960 and 2020. The various sectors which are mentioned include manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors.

Overall, it can be seen that the manufacturing sector created highest number of jobs until 2000 and gradually declined afterwards. On the other hand, the retail and healthcare sectors showed significant rise in creating employment opportunities and reached at its highest in 2020. Whereas, agriculture sector exhibited the least number of jobs and showed a steady declination by the end of 2020.

In the US economy, manufactuing sector provided the highest number of jobs between the years 1960 and 2000. It peaked at 20 million jobs in 1980, thereafter declined gradually and reached at around 13 million jobs in 2020. In contrast, retail and healthcare sectors faced close competition with each other. As a result, these sectors experienced a steady inclination in the availablillity of job positions and created close to 16 million jobs by 2020.

The agriculture sector started at 6 million jobs in 1960, with the rate of job creation declining gradually and reached at 3 million job positions in 1980. It remained at a steady number between 1980 and 2000 with a mere reduction to about 1 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response gives a clear overview of the main patterns: manufacturing peaks and then declines, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture remains the smallest sector. It also selects relevant figures, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million and its fall to about 13 million, and the two rising sectors reaching roughly 16 million by 2020. However, there are factual inaccuracies: manufacturing was not the highest sector throughout 1960–2000, since retail and manufacturing were equal at 15 million in 2000; and agriculture ended at about 2 million, not 1 million. The claim that retail and healthcare faced “close competition” also oversimplifies their different starting points and trajectories. More precise comparisons and accurate endpoint reporting would strengthen an otherwise well-focused summary.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised effectively into an introduction, an overview, and two detail paragraphs, with a generally clear progression from the broad trends to sector-specific figures. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “On the other hand,” “In contrast,” and “thereafter” help guide the reader through comparisons and changes over time. The final paragraph’s focus on agriculture is also easy to follow. Some connections are less precise: “As a result” suggests that the sectors’ close competition caused their rise, when it is simply describing a parallel trend, and “these sectors” could be followed by a clearer distinction between retail and healthcare. More exact linking and referencing would make the progression even more controlled.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

There is an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “peaked,” “declined,” “steady,” and “exhibited,” and the meaning remains clear throughout. The response also attempts more formal expressions such as “employment opportunities” and “job positions.” However, several choices are unnatural or imprecise for graph description: sectors do not usually “face close competition” in this context, and “inclination in the availability” is an awkward way to describe an increase. “Created” is also repeated where “employed” or “accounted for” would be more precise. Spelling errors such as “manufactuing” and “availablillity” further limit accuracy. Aim for natural collocations and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex structures, including contrast clauses and time expressions, and the main trends are generally communicated without difficulty. Some sentences show useful control, such as the manufacturing sentence combining a peak, a subsequent decline, and an endpoint. However, errors remain in sentence construction and grammatical patterns. For example, “reached at its highest” uses an unnecessary preposition, while “the rate … declining gradually and reached” shifts awkwardly between forms. In “the manufacturing sector created highest number,” the superlative needs an article. The overview also has a singular-plural mismatch in “the retail and healthcare sectors … reached at its highest.” More consistent control of articles, verb forms, and agreement would improve accuracy.

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