Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph compares the number of employment in four sectors of the U.S economy-manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare from 1960 to 2020.

Overall , employment in the manufacturing sector declined considerably, while the healthcare and retail sector incresed significantly. by contrast , the agriculture category compared to others had fewest jobs throughout the period.

In 1960, the figure for the retail sector stood at roughly 6 million , compared to 15 million for the manufacturing category . the retail sector had a significant rise to 15 million in 2000 before staying relatively stable by 2020. whereas the number of jobs in the manufacturing sector increased to 20 million in 1980, then it fell steadily to approximately 14 million in 2000.

Meanwhile, the healthcare sector showed substantial growth . it increased from justover 2 million in 1960 to 11 million in 2000 before reaching to highest point , the same as the retail sector in 2020, whereas the agriculture sector remained the lowest over the years . it declined from 6 million in 1960 to roughly 2 million in 2020 nd became the lowest of the categories .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak and then declines, healthcare and retail grow, and agriculture remains the smallest sector. You also include relevant figures, such as manufacturing at 20 million in 1980 and healthcare at 11 million in 2000. This gives the report a clear overview and covers the key series. However, some details are inaccurate: manufacturing falls to about 17 million in 2000, not 14 million, and retail reaches 16 million in 2020 rather than simply remaining stable after 2000. The final values for healthcare and retail are correctly compared. To strengthen the report, check each stage against the graph and describe the manufacturing decline and retail’s continued rise more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a sensible overall structure: an introduction, a summary of the main trends, and two paragraphs comparing the sectors. The grouping of retail with manufacturing, followed by healthcare with agriculture, helps the reader follow the data. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “Meanwhile,” and “by contrast” also signal relationships between ideas. However, some transitions are awkward or incomplete, particularly “whereas” at the start of a sentence after the retail description, and the repeated contrast markers make the flow less smooth. The final paragraph also combines several comparisons in a long sentence. Use clearer sentence boundaries and connect each comparison directly to the relevant trend to make progression more consistently controlled.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “declined considerably,” “significant rise,” “substantial growth,” and “remained the lowest.” These choices communicate the main patterns and show some variety beyond basic terms such as “went up” and “went down.” Some word choices and collocations are less natural, however: “number of employment” is better expressed as “number of jobs” or “employment figures,” and “reaching to highest point” is not idiomatic. There are also spelling and spacing slips, including “incresed,” “justover,” and “nd.” Greater accuracy with common chart-description phrases, alongside careful proofreading, would make the vocabulary more precise and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including comparisons with “while,” “before,” and “whereas,” and the main trends are generally understandable. Some grammatical errors remain, but they rarely prevent the reader from following the report. For example, “the healthcare and retail sector” needs plural agreement (“sectors”), and “before reaching to highest point” has an incorrect construction and is missing an article. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent: “by contrast” and “it” begin sentences without capitals, while several spaces appear before commas or full stops. Aim to form complete, well-punctuated sentences and check agreement, articles, and verb patterns in longer clauses.

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