Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph represents the number of jobs in four sector of economy from 1960 to 2020.

In last 2 years about 3to 5 millions jobs were organized in healthcare sector from 1960 to 1080 but in next years the people interested in retailers sector and the ratio of jobs increased from 10 million to 15 millions but no. of jobs in healthcare department also increase with the increase of retailers.In manufacturing company the no of jobs increase from 15 millions to 20 millions in 1980 to 2000.The economy of manufacture, health care and retailers increasing day by day with comparison. But the no of jobs in agriculture decreased from 1980 to 2020.From 1980 to 2020 the no. of jobs in manufacturing also decreased with the passage of time.The graph is also shown the interest of people according to their knowledge and experience.The economic level of every industries change with the flow of time.The people also have their desire and skils about any economy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the four sectors and makes a few relevant observations, including that agriculture declined and manufacturing fell after 1980. However, it only minimally summarises the graph: there is no clear overview of the main changes, and several trends or dates are inaccurate. For example, healthcare rose from about 2 million jobs in 1960 to 5 million in 1980, not “3 to 5,” while manufacturing increased from 15 to 20 million by 1980 and then declined; the response incorrectly places its rise “in 1980 to 2000.” The claim that the economy of these sectors is “increasing day by day” also conflicts with the declines shown. Focus on the overall ranking and contrasting trends, supported by accurate figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is some attempt to move through the sectors and use time references such as “from 1980 to 2020” and “with the passage of time.” However, the response is presented as one paragraph, with no clear overview or organised grouping of the information. Ideas often run together, as in the sentence linking retail growth, healthcare growth and manufacturing, so the reader has to work out which trend is being described. The repeated use of “the no. of jobs” and “the graph” does not create clear progression, and the final comments about people’s knowledge and desires do not connect logically to the data. Group the rising sectors together, contrast them with declining agriculture and manufacturing, and use clear sentence boundaries.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “increased,” “decreased,” “sector,” and “millions,” so the general subject is recognisable. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing a graph. “Jobs were organized in healthcare” does not express the number of people employed, while “the interest of people according to their knowledge and experience” introduces an unsupported interpretation. Repeated phrases such as “no. of jobs” and “with the passage of time” also limit precision. Use standard data-reporting language and accurate sector names; for example, describe employment as rising, falling, peaking or remaining stable rather than attributing changes to people’s interests.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts some longer sentences and uses past-tense verbs to describe changes, including “decreased” and “increased.” Basic meaning is often recoverable, but control is uneven: errors in agreement, articles, plurals and sentence construction recur. Examples include “four sector of economy,” “the graph is also shown,” and “the economy of manufacture, health care and retailers increasing.” The long sentence beginning “but in next years” combines several ideas without reliable grammatical links, and punctuation is inconsistent. Practise building accurate simple comparisons first, such as “Healthcare employment rose from about 2 million in 1960 to 5 million in 1980,” then add a controlled contrast using “whereas” or “while.”

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