Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph shows the data of workers in four different domain in United states from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, there was dramatic increase in individuals for healthcare and retail and downfall for manufacturing and agriculture industries through out these years. Moreover, maximum number of employees were in retail and healthcare in 2020 and were almost same in figures.

Manufacturing industry starts by 15 millions in 1960 and increase number of employees to 20 millions by 1980 and after that it start falling to arround 16millioins in 2020. However, approximately, 6 millions workers were in agriculture sector and it kept decreased to around 3 millions in 1980 and remain stable till 2000 and then only around 2 million workers left in this field by 2020.

Retail industry was at around 6 millions and kept rising to to 16 millions in 2020 and only around 3 million workers were worked in health care and kept rising and reached to 16 million individuals in this sectore

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad pattern: healthcare and retail rise, while agriculture declines, and you note that healthcare and retail finish at similar levels. You also include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 and agriculture falling to about 2 million by 2020. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing does not decline throughout the period, since it first rises, and it remains higher than agriculture. The final manufacturing figure is about 13 million, not around 16 million. The retail and healthcare descriptions are also compressed, and healthcare’s starting point is reported as 3 million rather than about 2 million. A clearer overview and more accurate comparisons across all four sectors would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction to an overview and then to sector details. Linking words such as “Overall,” “Moreover,” and “However” help signal relationships between ideas. The main weakness is that the final paragraph combines retail and healthcare in one long sentence, making it difficult to distinguish their separate trends and figures. Some references are also unclear, particularly “it” in the final sentence, which could refer to either sector. Organise the details into clearer comparisons—for example, describe manufacturing alongside agriculture, then retail alongside healthcare—and use separate sentences to show each series’ changes. This would strengthen progression and make the information easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “employees,” “workers,” “sector,” and “rising,” and the reader can generally understand which industries you mean. There is some variety in describing change, but several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for a chart summary: “downfall” is not a suitable description of a gradual decline, and “kept decreased” and “workers were worked” are awkward collocations. Spelling and word-form slips such as “arround,” “millioins,” and “sectore” also reduce precision. Aim for standard trend language and consistent units, such as “jobs,” “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable.” More accurate collocations would make the description clearer and more appropriately formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more developed sentences, including a contrast introduced by “However” and a summary sentence beginning “Overall.” However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction are noticeable and sometimes make the trends harder to interpret. For example, “Manufacturing industry starts … and increase” shifts tense and lacks consistent agreement; “it kept decreased” uses an incorrect verb form; and “workers were worked” has an incorrect passive construction. The final sentence also runs several ideas together without clear punctuation. Use the past tense consistently for the historical data, check subject–verb agreement, and divide long sentences so each sector’s trend is expressed in a complete, controlled clause.

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