Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph is comparingthe number of jobs in millions, in 4 major sectors of the US Economy: Manufacturing ,Retail,Agriculture and Health Care. Its the time period between [redacted phone].

Overall manufacturing was a dominant sector at the start of the period but it turned to a declining trend after 1980, while retail and health care were consistently increasing and showing upward trend. Agriculture sector was In contrasting situation, jobs fell steadily and became the smallest scetor by 2020.

In 1960 manufacturing employed 15 million people. it was significantly a high number than retail with 6million, Agriculture with 5 milliom and health care with only 2 million. Retail and health care also grew to around 10 millionand 4 million respectively, while agriculture dropped to about 2.5 million.

Between 200 and 2020 trends continued on existig pattern. Manufacturing jobs dropped to 17 millionin 2000 and further reduced to 12 million in 2020. Retail inresed from 14.5 million in 2000 and touched to 16 million in 2020. Health care reflected adramatic growth , from 11 million in 2000 to 16 million in 2020.Reatil has over powered on manufacturing at this stage, Agriculture was still on downward trend, reduced less than 1 million in 2020.

In summary Us Labor market shifted from manufacturing to service basedsectors like retail and health care.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then declines, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture becomes the smallest sector. The final comparison that employment shifts towards service sectors is also a relevant summary. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear: agriculture is about 6 million in 1960, not 5 million, and remains around 2 million in 2020 rather than falling below 1 million. The 1980 healthcare figure is about 5 million, not 4 million, and the period is mistakenly written as “Between 200 and 2020.” You report several useful figures, but the account of the middle years is less complete and precise than the overview. More accurate comparisons across all four dates would strengthen the report.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, details about the earlier period, and a later-period comparison. This makes the main direction of change easy to follow, and phrases such as “Overall” and “In summary” signal the purpose of those sections. However, the progression is weakened by the unclear time reference “Between 200 and 2020” and by moving from 1960 directly to 2000 without clearly describing the 1980 peak for manufacturing. Some linking is also mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “while” to join comparisons. Organise the details consistently by time period or by sector, and use clearer references to connect each figure to its year.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “dominant sector,” “declining trend,” “dramatic growth,” and “downward trend,” which helps describe changes rather than merely list figures. However, several word-choice and collocation problems reduce precision: “touched to 16 million,” “over powered on manufacturing,” and “trends continued on existig pattern” are not natural ways to describe the data. There are also spelling errors such as “scetor,” “milliom,” and “Reatil,” alongside inconsistent spacing and capitalisation. Aim for accurate, conventional chart language and proofread carefully; for example, use “rose to,” “overtook,” and “continued in the same pattern.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including comparisons joined with “while” and the overview sentence contrasting manufacturing with retail and healthcare. The main meaning is generally recoverable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity. For example, “Its the time period between 1960-2020” lacks the correct possessive form and has an awkward construction; “Retail and health care also grew to around 10 millionand 4 million respectively” has faulty spacing and an unclear comparison; and “Agriculture sector was In contrasting situation” has problems with articles and sentence-case punctuation. Tense and sentence boundaries also need more consistent control. Check each sentence for complete clauses, correct articles, and punctuation, while retaining your attempts at varied structures.

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