Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The bar chart compares the figures for job in four economic sector_manufacturing, retail,agriculture and healthcare in the UK from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, all sectors showed contrasting trends, with agriculture and retail sector at same level, number of agriculture sector's jobs droped and recorded at lowest while those of retail increased significantly and become the leading category. Healthcare sector started from lowest and reached as high as retail.

Regarding retail and agriculture, figure for both sector's job stood at around 6 millions. Subsequently, employment rate for agriculture witnessed a downward trend and finish at nearly 2 million whereas that of retail rose considerably and ranked first at approximately 6 million.

On the other hand, although the employment rate for manufacturing sector began with the highest, it declined notably and became the second leading category. In contrast, the number of jobs in healthcare sector started with lowest, which surge cosistently and peak at around 16 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad contrast between declining agriculture and growing retail and healthcare, and you note that manufacturing starts as the largest sector before falling. However, several key details are inaccurate or incomplete. Retail does not finish at approximately 6 million; it rises from 6 million to about 16 million, becoming joint-largest with healthcare. Manufacturing falls from 20 million in 1980 to 13 million in 2020, but the response does not report its peak or give a clear account of the intermediate trends. The overview also says agriculture and retail were at the same level without specifying this applies only at the start. A more accurate overview and selected figures for all four sectors would make the summary more complete and clear.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs grouping agriculture with retail and manufacturing with healthcare. This gives the reader a coherent route through the information, and linking phrases such as “Subsequently” and “In contrast” help signal changes. To make the progression more effective, ensure each comparison follows the chart accurately and develop the time sequence consistently. For example, the retail paragraph jumps from the initial value to an incorrect final figure, while the manufacturing paragraph omits the 1980 high point. Some phrasing, such as “On the other hand,” does not establish a particularly clear contrast between the two sectors that follow. More precise referencing and transitions would strengthen cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “downward trend,” “declined notably,” “increased significantly,” and “leading category.” These expressions help describe movement and comparison, and the meaning is generally understandable. However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward: “figures for job,” “employment rate” for job totals, and “ranked first” are not the most natural ways to describe this graph. There are also spelling errors such as “droped” and “cosistently,” and “economic sector_manufacturing” is unclear. Use precise terms such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” and “rose steadily,” and check spelling and word forms to make the description more fluent and accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including “although the employment rate for manufacturing sector began with the highest, it declined notably” and “which surge consistently.” This shows some ability to form subordinate clauses, but errors in agreement, tense, articles, and plurals remain. For example, “number of agriculture sector's jobs droped” needs a past-tense verb, while “those of retail increased” has an unclear reference. Phrases such as “both sector's job” and “started with lowest” also need more accurate number and article forms. These issues do not prevent the reader from following the main message, but they reduce precision. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and check subject–verb agreement and noun forms in each sentence.

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