Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrate the amount of jobs in four sectors of economy situation in the US between 1960 qnd 2020.

Overall,jobs increased in all four setors between 1960 to 1980.Manufacturing consistently recorded the highest job sector of the economy in the US in 1980.While Health care despite being with lowest figure experienced the most dramatic growth by the end of the time frame.

In 1960,retail sector stood at above 5 million which the above the lower range and this figur continuesly rose steadily between 1980 to 2020, around 16 million by 2020.healthcare also showed a gradual increase climbing from roughly 3 million to about 16 million over the 60 years, although it remained the same level as retail sector.

Manufacturing began at roughly 15 million jobs in 1960 and although it fluctuated slightly high in 1980 it grew moderatelyto just over 20 years, however after that its gradualy falling in 2020. In contrast,agriculture sector started with approximetly 6 million and its fall rapidaly in 2020 nearly 2 million recorded lowest sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify several important patterns: manufacturing peaks around 1980 before declining, while healthcare rises strongly and agriculture falls to the lowest level. The overview also attempts to compare the sectors, which helps address the task. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear. The opening overview says jobs increased in all four sectors from 1960 to 1980, but agriculture fell from about 6 million to 3 million. Healthcare starts at about 2 million, not 3 million, and the claim that it remained at the same level as retail is only true at the end. The manufacturing peak is about 20 million, not “just over 20.” Report the main trends more precisely and distinguish the sectors’ different paths.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction and overview to paragraphs describing the sectors. Comparisons such as “In contrast” help signal relationships, and the reader can generally follow the broad trends. However, progression is weakened by unclear links and some awkward sentence boundaries. For example, “Overall,jobs increased…” is followed by a claim about manufacturing that does not connect smoothly to the healthcare comparison. The final paragraph combines manufacturing and agriculture, while the earlier paragraphs group retail and healthcare; clearer, consistent grouping would make the comparisons easier to follow. Use punctuation and linking phrases more carefully, and ensure each paragraph develops one clear comparison.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “fluctuated,” “gradual increase,” “climbing,” and “dramatic growth,” and you attempt to describe changes rather than simply list figures. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “amount of jobs,” “highest job sector,” “lower range,” and “grew moderately to just over 20 years.” Spelling errors, including “setors,” “continuesly,” and “approximetly,” also reduce precision. Choose standard expressions for chart descriptions, such as “number of jobs,” “highest employment level,” and “rose to around 20 million.” More accurate vocabulary and spelling would make your comparisons clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “although” and “while,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, grammatical control is uneven, particularly in longer sentences. The opening, “The line graph illustrate,” has subject–verb disagreement, while “between 1960 to 1980” uses an incorrect preposition pattern. In “retail sector stood at above 5 million which the above the lower range,” the clause is incomplete and the sentence structure breaks down. Missing spaces after punctuation and inconsistent commas also affect readability. Practise accurate sentence boundaries, agreement, articles, and preposition patterns, then check complex sentences to ensure each clause is complete.

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