Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph at hand illustrates the changes in the number of jobs in the United states, over a period of sixety years from 1960 to 2020. It comapres four various sectors namely( Manufacturing, Reatil,Agriculture, and Healthcare). The units are measured in millions.

At first galnce, it is evident that Manufacturing had the highest values during the first period, wherease the agriculture sector showed the lowest throughout the period. In addition, some sectors increased and decreased, while others remained relatively stable with just minor fluctuations.

For instance, Manufacturing commenced at 15 million of occupations in the first period, before decreasing steadily to around 12 million in 2020, surpassing the both sectors Retail and Healthcare. Similarly, Healthcare followed an upward trend which increasing significantly from 5 to around 15 million in the end year.

By contrast, Agriculture exhibited a downward trend, whithits figures falling from 6 million to approximately 1 million of jobs in 2020, which represnted the smallest values throughout the period.

Overall, the graph shows the trend of four sectors , which Manufacturing, Retail, and Helthacre wasthe dominants of the economy in the US, while The agriculture sector reained the least one overtime.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview that manufacturing starts highest and agriculture remains lowest, which addresses some key features. However, the account is only partial and includes important inaccuracies: manufacturing does not finish above retail and healthcare; it ends at about 13 million, while both sectors reach around 16 million. Healthcare rises from about 2 million in 1960, not 5 million, and retail’s substantial increase is largely omitted. The claim that some sectors remained relatively stable is also unclear, since retail and healthcare rise markedly. To strengthen the response, report the main changes for all four sectors and compare their positions at the end.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, supporting details, and a concluding statement. Sequencing phrases such as “At first glance,” “For instance,” and “By contrast” help signal the direction of the discussion, and the reader can generally follow the intended comparisons. However, the conclusion repeats the overview rather than adding a clear final comparison, and the paragraph about manufacturing and healthcare combines trends without fully clarifying their relationship. Some linking is also mechanical, while “Similarly” does not make the contrast between the two sectors especially clear. Organise the details into clearer comparisons—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together—and use references that make each comparison explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “upward trend,” “downward trend,” “fluctuations,” and “approximately,” so the response can describe general movement. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, such as “sixety,” “comapres,” “Reatil,” and “Helthacre.” Some expressions are also unnatural for this chart: “15 million of occupations” and “the dominants of the economy” do not clearly describe job totals or sector rankings. Use accurate sector names consistently and prefer standard collocations such as “the number of jobs rose” or “employment in healthcare increased.” More precise vocabulary would also help distinguish a rise, a fall, and a stable period.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple statements and longer sentences, including clauses with “before” and “while,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur frequently enough to make some passages difficult to read. For example, “Healthcare followed an upward trend which increasing” needs a finite verb (“which increased”), while “Manufacturing, Retail, and Helthacre wasthe dominants” has problems with agreement and sentence structure. The opening also uses an awkward comma between the subject and time phrase. Practise building accurate comparisons with a clear subject and verb, and check each sentence for agreement and complete clauses before adding extra information.

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