Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph shows about the number of jobs infour sectors - manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. it is data of US economy between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the highest number of vacancies can be seen in retail and healthcare sector in 2020 whereas agriculture is ranked at lowest followed by manufacturing in same year.

In 1960, retail and agriculture sector had equal number of opportunities accounted for 6 million jobs. Healthcare was at its lowest accounted for 2 millions jobs approximately whereas manufacturing was at its peak providing 15 millions jobs.

In 1980, manufacturing was again at its peak and rose from 15 millions to 20 millions jobs opportunities. But agriculture fell down from 6 millions to 4 millions jobs. However. retail and healthcare sectors continued to grow.

In 2000, manufacturing sector number of jobs declined from 20 millions to 17 million which continued to fell down by 13 millions number of jobs in 2020. But healthcare and retail sector continued to increse the number of jobs as it was marked equall in 2020 wround 16 millions. However, agriculure sector decline at 3 millions jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then declines, while retail and healthcare rise and agriculture falls. The overview also correctly highlights agriculture as the smallest sector in 2020. However, it inaccurately says manufacturing ranked below agriculture that year; manufacturing had about 13 million jobs, compared with agriculture’s 2 million. The account includes useful figures for 1960, 1980 and 2000, but some details are unclear or incomplete: for example, healthcare and retail are said to “continued to grow” without reporting their 1980 or 2000 values. To strengthen the response, make the overview comparisons fully accurate and report the key endpoints and changes more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and paragraphs organised by year. This gives the reader a generally coherent route through the data. However, organising the details chronologically leads to repeated descriptions of individual years rather than grouping the sectors by their trends, and some links are mechanical, such as repeated uses of “However” and “But.” The final paragraph also combines several trends in a long sequence, making the comparisons harder to follow. Grouping the rising sectors together and contrasting them with the declining sectors would create clearer progression. Check that each linking word expresses the intended relationship and use references such as “the two sectors” only when their meaning is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “declined,” “rose,” “peak” and “accounted for,” so the main trends are usually understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “number of opportunities,” “fell down” and “continued to fell down.” “Vacancies” is also not an exact substitute for the number of jobs shown. Spelling errors—including “increse,” “equall,” “wround” and “agriculure”—are noticeable and reduce precision. Aim for a smaller set of accurate, natural expressions for describing figures, such as “the number of jobs stood at,” “increased steadily” and “fell to.” This would make the report more precise without requiring unnecessarily complex vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including contrasts introduced by “whereas” and “although” in effect, and the overall meaning can generally be followed. However, errors in sentence construction, tense, agreement and punctuation are frequent enough to make some comparisons awkward. For example, “Healthcare was at its lowest accounted for 2 millions jobs” lacks a clear grammatical connection between its clauses, while “which continued to fell down” uses an incorrect verb form. There are also issues with plural forms and sentence boundaries, as in “However.” after the 1980 sentence. Practise building complete sentences around a clear subject and verb, and check past-tense forms, singular/plural agreement and punctuation.

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