Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the changes in employment sectors between 1960 and 2020. It compares four various categories namley( Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare). The units are measured in millions.
At first glance, it is evident that Manufacturing was growth up in the beginning period, wherease Agriculture showed the least. In addition, both Retail and healthcare overtook the others sectors in the end period. Some categories increased and decreased, while others remaoined relatively stable with minor fluctuations.
For instance, The manufacturing sector started at 15 millions before decreasing steadily to around 12 million in 2020. Retail and Healthcare both followed an upward trend reached from roughly 6 millions to 16 millions by 2020.
In contrast, Agriculture exhibited a downward trend, with its figures declining gradually from 6 millions to 1 employement in the final year, which represented the smallest values in the United States overtime.
In summary, the graph shows the trend of the sectors, which some begin the leading of emplyment, while other the least.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview: manufacturing rises initially, agriculture is the smallest overall, and retail and healthcare grow. However, the overview is partly unclear and not fully accurate: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before falling, while retail and healthcare are joint-highest at about 16 million in 2020, rather than clearly overtaking all other sectors. Some figures are also misreported: manufacturing ends at about 13 million, not 12; agriculture ends at about 2 million, not 1; and retail begins at 6 and reaches 16, while healthcare begins at 2, not 6. The response selects relevant trends, but limited comparisons and these inaccuracies leave parts of the task only partially addressed. Give each series its own accurate start, key change and end point.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction to an overview, supporting details and a concluding sentence. Paragraphing helps separate the general picture from examples, and phrases such as “In contrast” signal a comparison. However, progression is sometimes weakened by unclear or repetitive statements. “Some categories increased and decreased, while others remained relatively stable” is vague and does not clearly match the graph, while the final sentence repeats the idea of leading and least employment without adding a useful summary. Connections between the overview and the figures could also be clearer. Organise the body by contrasting the rising sectors with the declining ones, and use precise references such as “by 2020” to make comparisons easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “upward trend,” “downward trend,” “declining” and “figures,” so the main trends are generally understandable. However, the range and control are limited by inaccurate or awkward expressions, including “four various categories,” “was growth up,” “overtook the others sectors” and “the leading of employment.” Spelling and word-form errors such as “namley,” “remaoined,” “employement” and “emplyment” are noticeable and reduce precision. Some phrases also do not describe the data naturally: “stable with minor fluctuations” is not a good fit for the clear changes shown. Build a reliable set of trend verbs and comparison phrases, and check spelling and collocations before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “whereas” and “while,” and the reader can usually understand the intended comparisons. However, complex structures are often faulty, as in “Retail and Healthcare both followed an upward trend reached from roughly 6 millions to 16 millions,” where the verb pattern is incomplete. The overview sentence “Manufacturing was growth up” also has an incorrect verb construction, and “which some begin the leading of employment” is not grammatically complete. There are recurring problems with articles, plurals and agreement, for example “the others sectors” and “15 millions.” Aim first for accurate sentence patterns: write “Manufacturing rose” or “Manufacturing increased,” then use a separate clause to report its later decline.
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