Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A glance at the given graph illustartes the numbers of employment in four sectors of US economy from 1960 to 2020

Overall sectors of US economy are mainly consist of Manufacturing,retail,agriculture and healthcare,where the manufacturing positions increased significantly while the proportion of agriculture declined meanwhile retail jobs rose gradually.

Initially the Manufacturing figure increased over the period between 1960 to 1980 with highest employment around 20 million postings but after that there is significant drop shown till the year 2020 meanwhile for the retail positions edge up sharply and crossed the number of manufacturing vacancies over the time period between 2000 to 2020 with 16 million openings.

on the other hand where the healthcare was at bottom level in 1960 among other opportunites it got rapid growth in number of vacanies and reached at the same level with the retail number of opportunities while if we compare other sectors with agriculture ,the figures depicts opposite and declinement of line graph where other sectors made up a progress but this is the only field which shows reducing number of opportunites over the time period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main movements and make relevant comparisons: manufacturing peaks at about 20 million in 1980 before declining, while retail and healthcare rise and agriculture falls. The overview also recognises agriculture as the only sector to decline overall. These points show a sound grasp of the chart. To make the account more complete and precise, clarify that manufacturing does not rise throughout the period, and state that retail and healthcare both finish at around 16 million in 2020. The claim that retail crossed manufacturing between 2000 and 2020 is broadly supported, but the timing is not shown precisely by the four plotted years. Agriculture’s figures and its relatively low level could also be reported more clearly. The response covers the task, though some comparisons and details are less fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing sector trends. This gives the reader a generally coherent route through the information. However, some links are mechanical or unclear, particularly the long final sentence beginning “on the other hand where” and the repeated use of “meanwhile” to connect contrasting trends. Several sentences combine multiple comparisons, making the progression harder to follow. Use one main comparison per sentence, and make the relationship explicit—for example, contrast manufacturing’s decline after 1980 with the continued growth in retail and healthcare. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise referencing would make the organisation smoother while preserving the useful paragraph structure.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary relevant to describing trends, including “increased significantly,” “rapid growth,” “declined,” and “crossed.” This helps communicate the broad patterns. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for chart reporting: “numbers of employment,” “manufacturing positions,” “postings,” and “vacancies” are not the clearest ways to describe job totals. “Declinement” is also not an appropriate form, and spelling errors such as “illustartes,” “vacanies,” and “opportunites” reduce accuracy. Prefer consistent terms such as “number of jobs” or “employment,” and use standard trend language such as “rose,” “fell,” and “reached.” Greater precision and more reliable spelling would strengthen the range you are already attempting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses linked with “while” and “whereas,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. Some grammatical errors nevertheless make the relationships between ideas difficult to follow. For example, “sectors of US economy are mainly consist of” has an incorrect verb construction, while “the manufacturing figure increased … but after that there is significant drop” shifts tense and omits an article. The final sentence also lacks a clear grammatical structure and contains several clauses joined without effective punctuation. Use past tense consistently for the historical data, check subject–verb patterns, and divide long sentences into shorter units. These changes would improve accuracy without requiring more complicated structures.

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