Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates statestic of jobs in four different sector of the economy in the US over the six decades.

Overall, health care and retail category inclined over the years and in the end in same point and agriculture and manufacturing sector is declined over the period of time in beetween 1960 and 2020.

In 1960, manufacturing was in picked at 15 millions and then it went up to the 20 million in 1980 and then it decresed steadily and gone to approximately 13 millions in 2020. Whereas, healthcare was lowest at approximately 2 millions in 1960 and it increased stedily and went up to the more than 15 millions in 2020.

Retail and healthcare sector are starting from same position at approximately more than 5 millions and retails category went up steadily and touch to the healthcare sector at more than 15 millions in 2020 whereas agriculture steadily decresed and went down to the approximately 2 millions in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main broad movements and include an overview: healthcare and retail rise, while agriculture falls, and manufacturing peaks before declining. The manufacturing figures (15, 20 and about 13 million) and agriculture’s fall to around 2 million are broadly accurate. This covers the task well, with some features more fully reported than others. However, the overview incorrectly says agriculture and manufacturing both declined throughout; manufacturing first rose, and retail and healthcare only reach the same level at the end, not throughout. The comparison that retail and healthcare began at “more than 5 millions” is also inaccurate: healthcare began at about 2 million. To strengthen the response further, make the overview more precise and compare the key changes across all four sectors, including retail’s rise from 6 to 16 million.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall shape: an introduction, a summary of the main trends, and two paragraphs of detail. Sequencing by time and the use of “Overall,” “In 1960,” and “Whereas” help the reader follow the account. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The overview combines opposing trends in a confusing sentence, and the final paragraph shifts from retail and healthcare to agriculture without clearly separating the comparisons. “Whereas” also introduces a contrast, but the relationship between the figures is not fully explained. Organise the details into clearer comparisons—for example, grouping the two rising sectors together and then describing manufacturing and agriculture—and use references such as “the former” only when their meaning is unmistakable.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased,” “decreased,” “steadily,” and “approximately,” so the reader can understand the general direction of change. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, form, and spelling errors make the description less natural: “statestic,” “in picked,” “decresed,” and “touch to” are examples. Some phrases are also imprecise, such as “inclined over the years” for a rising trend and “in same point” for reaching the same level. Aim for accurate, conventional chart language and vary it selectively: “rose,” “reached a peak,” “fell,” and “ended at” are useful options. Check spelling and use sector names consistently, such as “healthcare” and “retail.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “Whereas” and a sequence of changes linked by “and then.” However, the structures are often faulty, and errors sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to follow. For example, “health care and retail category inclined” has problems with agreement and sentence structure, while “manufacturing was in picked at 15 millions” does not form a correct grammatical pattern. Articles, plurals, and verb forms also need attention, as in “the 20 million” and “agriculture and manufacturing sector is declined.” Practise building shorter, accurate comparison sentences first, then combine them with clauses such as “while” or “whereas.” Check subject–verb agreement and singular/plural forms when editing.

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