Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Thr line graph illustrates changes in the number of jobs in four various sectors of the economy in the US from1960 to 2020. Overall, it can be clearly seen that the highest number of jobs in Manufacturing sector, while the lowest number of jobs in Agriculture sector.
REgarding Healthcare, figures commenced at 2 millions in 1960, after which they surged significantly to reach a zenith of Manufacturing in 1960. Following this marked escalation, the number leveled off fluctuations cluminating at 16 millions by 2020. In stark contrast, Retail grew at far more modest pace, rising steadily from 6 millions to 16 millions.
In Agricluture, in 1960 accounted for 6 millions, it is rapidly decline in 1980 and 2000 approximatly 4 millions, while in 2020, slightly decrease around 2 millions. Manufacturing the highest proportion in 1980 at 20 millions than lower in 2020 around 14 millions . so overall the higheast numer of Manufacturing .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify the broad contrast between manufacturing and agriculture, and include figures for all four sectors. However, the overview is unclear and partly inaccurate: manufacturing was not the highest throughout the period, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million jobs in 2020, compared with manufacturing at about 13 million. The healthcare account contains a major misreading: it says the series reached a “zenith of Manufacturing in 1960,” rather than describing its rise to around 16 million in 2020. Agriculture is broadly described correctly, though it fell to about 3 million by 1980 and remained there in 2000. To improve, give a clear overview of the main changes and accurately compare the leading sectors at the beginning and end.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response has an opening, an overview, and separate discussion of some sectors, so there is an attempt to organise the information. However, progression is difficult to follow because the healthcare paragraph shifts abruptly into an unclear phrase about manufacturing, and the final paragraph combines agriculture and manufacturing without a clear transition. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “Regarding,” and “In stark contrast” are used, but they do not always make the relationships between ideas clear. The overview also repeats the claim that manufacturing had the highest number of jobs. Grouping the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, then using clear comparisons within each paragraph, would create a more logical progression.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You attempt a range of trend vocabulary, including “surged significantly,” “leveled off,” “marked escalation,” and “decline,” which shows an effort to describe changes rather than simply list figures. However, several choices are inaccurate or awkward in context: “a zenith of Manufacturing” does not communicate a meaningful value, and “highest proportion” is unsuitable when the chart reports numbers of jobs. Spelling errors such as “Agricluture,” “cluminating,” and “higheast” also reduce clarity. Some phrases, including “four various sectors” and “far more modest pace,” are not natural for this comparison. Aim for precise, conventional chart language and check spelling and collocations carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
There are attempts at complex structures, for example “after which they surged significantly” and “while in 2020, slightly decrease around 2 millions,” but control is inconsistent. Several sentences lack a complete or correctly formed clause: “Overall, it can be clearly seen that the highest number of jobs in Manufacturing sector” has no main verb after “that,” while “In Agricluture, in 1960 accounted for 6 millions” has no clear subject. Tense and verb-form errors also appear in “it is rapidly decline” and “slightly decrease.” Articles, plurals, and sentence punctuation need attention as well. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use past-tense forms consistently when reporting this historical data.
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