Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates the informatiion about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the United States between 1960 and 2020.

It is evident from the graph that retail and healthcare jobs are dominant at the end of the graph. While jobs related to agriculture are decreasing.

Turning towards the details of the graph, jobs related to manufacturing are at the top of the graph with 15 million jobs in 1960. Then in 1980, this number becomes 20 million. But after that it continuously decreases and become nearly 13 million in 2020. While talking about agricultural jobs, they were about 6 million in 1960. After that, this number decreases to 3 million in 1980 and remain still untill 2000. But in 2020, after a slight decrease this number become neart to 2 million.

Now talking about retail and healthcare jobs, there number increases every year and become 16 million in 2020. Although they were far behind from manufacturing job s at the start of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad pattern that manufacturing declines after peaking, agriculture falls, and retail and healthcare grow to become the leading sectors by 2020. Several figures are also reported accurately, including manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980, and agriculture falling from 6 million to about 2 million. However, the overview is incomplete: it does not mention manufacturing’s peak or clearly compare the two rising sectors. The claim that retail and healthcare “increases every year” is too broad, since the chart only gives four points, and their starting values differ (retail 6 million, healthcare 2 million). Include the main comparisons and describe the trends precisely to make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable sequence: an introduction, a brief overview, and two detail paragraphs grouping manufacturing with agriculture and then retail with healthcare. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is uneven because the final paragraph is very brief and leaves the two growing sectors largely undescribed, while the earlier paragraphs contain most of the detail. Linking words such as “Then,” “But after that,” and “Now talking about” help mark sequence, but their repeated, conversational use makes cohesion somewhat mechanical. Some references, such as “this number,” are also less precise when several figures are being discussed. Organise the details more evenly and use clearer comparisons between sectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic vocabulary to communicate the main trends, including “decreases,” “slight decrease,” “dominant,” and “far behind.” However, the range is limited and some expressions are imprecise or unnatural for a data summary. For example, “jobs related to agriculture” and “talking about” are repeated or conversational, while “become near to 2 million” does not express the figure naturally. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “informatiion,” “untill,” “neart,” and “there number.” These do not prevent the reader from understanding the overall message, but they reduce accuracy and fluency. Prefer concise chart language such as “employment in agriculture” and “stood at approximately” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple statements and longer sentences, including a contrast with “Although” and time-sequencing clauses. The main meaning is generally understandable, but errors recur in verb forms, agreement, and sentence construction. For example, “this number … become nearly 13 million” should use a past-tense verb, and “this number decreases … and remain still” mixes tense and has incorrect agreement. “Retail and healthcare jobs, there number increases” is also an incorrectly formed sentence; the possessive should be “their,” and the clause needs a clear subject structure. The opening overview fragment beginning “While jobs related to agriculture…” is not a complete sentence. Use consistent past tense for the historical data and check that each clause has a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

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