Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, job oppurtunites in healthcare and retail have massive increase in this time span. Number of jobs in manufacturing sector has increased initialiy but they ended up under both the retail and healthcare. Agriculture sector faces issue in the job market.
Regarding the healthcare, the job oppurtunities were approximately 2 million in 1960 and they increased year by year and in 2020 the numbers enden up just above 15 million. Retail sector has around 6 million job opputunities in the start and the numbers increases to 15 million in 2000 and it just increased steadly from 2000 to 2020.
Related to the manufacturing, it has mojority of the job oppurtunity in 1960 as compare to other sectors and its numbers went up till 1980 but after that it start decreasing and ended up around 13 million in 2020. Number od jobs in agriculture sector decreased fastly from 1960 to 1980 and then they decsrese consistent from 1980 to 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify the main broad patterns: healthcare and retail rise, manufacturing peaks before declining, and agriculture falls. The overview also notes that manufacturing finishes below retail and healthcare, which is an important comparison. Most figures are consistent with the chart, including healthcare at about 2 million initially and manufacturing ending near 13 million. However, some details are incomplete or imprecise: retail reaches about 16 million by 2020, rather than merely increasing steadily from 2000, and agriculture falls from about 3 million in 1980 to 2 million in 2020, not consistently throughout that period. The claim that agriculture “faces issue in the job market” is vague. A clearer overview and more precise comparisons between the final figures would make the key features better developed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the sectors. Grouping healthcare with retail and manufacturing with agriculture is a sensible way to organise the information. However, progression within the paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, with repeated openings such as “Regarding,” “Related to,” and “sector.” Some links between ideas are also unclear; for example, “they ended up under both the retail and healthcare” does not clearly specify that manufacturing jobs finished below those sectors. The agriculture description would benefit from a more explicit sequence of its stages. Use clearer references and connect comparisons directly, rather than relying on repeated transition phrases.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use relevant task vocabulary such as “sector,” “increased,” “decreasing,” and “approximately,” so the main trends are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, including “job opportunities” for the number of jobs, “massive increase,” and “faces issue in the job market.” Spelling errors are also noticeable, for example “oppurtunites,” “steadly,” and “mojority.” These errors make the description less precise and occasionally distract the reader. Aim for accurate chart language and check spelling carefully; terms such as “employment,” “rose,” “declined,” and “remained stable” would help describe the data more naturally.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, and the overall meaning is usually clear. Some sentence patterns are handled successfully, such as “its numbers went up till 1980 but after that it start decreasing.” However, there are errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. For example, “the numbers increases” should use a plural-compatible verb form, while “it start decreasing” needs a past-tense verb. In “the numbers enden up,” the verb form is also incorrect. The overview sentence “Number of jobs in manufacturing sector” is missing articles. These errors do not usually prevent understanding, but they reduce accuracy. Review past-tense reporting and article use, and proofread each sentence for subject–verb agreement.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.
