Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line chart below represents four different departments of the US economy and how the number of jobs changed between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the amount of employment roles in the Healthcare and Retail industry increased substantially. Whereas, the number of jobs for the Manufacturing and Agriculture sectors declined over the time period. Agriculture sectors produced the highest number of jobs and number of jobs in the Agriculture sectors remained the lowest.

In the first half of 1980s, job opportunities in the Manufacturing department went up from 15 millions to 20 million. While jobs in the retail department gained the second most numbers jumping from 6 million to 10 million. Number of jobs in the Healthcare rose from approximately 2.5 million upto 5 million. The job opportunities kept on increasing fro both retail and Healthcare reaching around 16 million simultaneously in 2020. Meanwhile the only department in which number of jobs fell was Agriculture during this period.

In the later years, Manufacturing jobs kept declining until they were approimately 14 million by 2020. Agriculture jobs numbers remained the same at 3 million from 1980 to 2000, after they decreased to a small extent in 2020 at 2.5 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad contrast between rising employment in healthcare and retail and falling employment in agriculture, and you include several relevant figures. However, the overview contains a major reversal: it says agriculture produced the highest number of jobs, when it was consistently the lowest or joint-lowest. It also says manufacturing and agriculture both declined overall, overlooking manufacturing’s rise to a peak of 20 million in 1980 before falling. The body gives useful details, but “the only department in which number of jobs fell” is unclear and inaccurate for the period described, since manufacturing later declined too. To strengthen the response, give a precise overview of the main rankings and turning points, and compare the sectors accurately across the full period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs, and it generally moves from broad trends to figures. However, progression is weakened by the division into “the first half of 1980s” and “the later years,” which does not clearly match the chart’s four dates or the trends being compared. Some linking is awkward or incomplete: “Whereas” begins a fragment, and “Meanwhile the only department…” does not clearly connect to the preceding account. The overview’s contradictory statement about agriculture also makes the information harder to follow. Organise the details by clear time periods or by sectors, and use linking phrases to show contrasts and changes without creating fragments.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “increased substantially,” “declining,” “reaching” and “remained the same,” so the main trends are usually understandable. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for this chart: “departments” and “industry” are used inconsistently for economic sectors, while “gained the second most numbers” and “job opportunities” are imprecise descriptions of employment totals. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “approimately” and “fro,” and some awkward phrasing such as “Agriculture sectors produced.” Aim for precise, consistent terms such as “sector,” “employment” and “number of jobs,” and check spelling and collocations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex structures, including comparisons and time clauses, and the overall meaning can generally be followed. However, errors recur in sentence construction and grammatical forms. “Whereas, the number…” is a fragment, and “In the first half of 1980s” has an incorrect time expression and missing article. The opening “between 1960 to 2020” uses the wrong preposition pattern; use “between 1960 and 2020.” There are also number and agreement problems in “15 millions” and “Agriculture sectors,” as well as awkward clause construction in “after they decreased.” Build accuracy by checking complete sentences, singular/plural forms, articles and standard preposition patterns, while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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