Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the trends in the quantity of jobs segmented by economic sectors, namely , manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020. Overall, manufacturing and healthcare witnessed a decline, while retail and agriculture registered a marked increase over the period.

In 1960, pattern for manufacturing was 15 millions, before reaching a high of 20 millions in 1980. After then, it had plummeted to around 13 millions by 2020. In contrast, the agriculture sector was responsible for around 7 millions in the 1960, after which it decreased to almost 3 millions in 1980. Over a four decades, it remained almost stable , finishing off at nearly 2 millions in 2020.

Turning to retail and healthcare sector, both displayed a significant growth, finishing at similar point. To behin with, the pattern for former surged dramatically, starting off at almost 7 millions in 1960 and reaching around 17 millions in 2020, supassing the manufacturing at apprroximately 16 millions after 2000. Similarly, the pattern for healthcare showed a steady upward trend, climbing from around 2 millions in 1960 to precise 5 millions by outnumbering the healthcare in 1980. Between 1980 and 2020, it ascended significantly , reaching almost 17 millions in 2020, which was the same

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing rising from 15 million jobs to 20 million in 1980 before falling, and healthcare increasing from 2 million to around 16 million. However, the overview contains a major reversal: it says manufacturing and healthcare declined and retail and agriculture increased, whereas the graph shows manufacturing and agriculture declining, with retail and healthcare rising. Some comparisons are also inaccurate or unclear: retail and healthcare finish at about 16 million, not 17, and the statement about retail surpassing manufacturing “after 2000” is imprecise. The final sentence is unfinished, leaving the healthcare comparison incomplete. A more accurate overview and clearer selection of key comparisons would make the report more complete and developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction and overview are followed by paragraphs grouping manufacturing with agriculture, then retail with healthcare. Sequencing within the descriptions is generally chronological, and transitions such as “In contrast” and “Turning to” help signal comparisons. However, the incorrect overview conflicts with the detailed account, weakening the overall progression. Some references are difficult to follow, particularly “the pattern for former” and “by outnumbering the healthcare in 1980”; the latter does not clearly identify which sector is being compared. The final clause, “which was the same,” is incomplete and disrupts cohesion. Use clear sector names instead of vague references, and ensure each paragraph and the conclusion form complete, consistent ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonably varied range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “reaching a high,” “remained almost stable,” “surged dramatically,” and “steady upward trend.” These choices show an effort to avoid repetitive wording and communicate changes over time. Some expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, however: “pattern for manufacturing was 15 millions” does not naturally describe a job total, and “responsible for around 7 millions” is an awkward way to report employment figures. There are also spelling errors, including “To behin,” “supassing,” and “apprroximately,” which reduce precision. Choose standard chart-reporting collocations and check spelling carefully; this will make the vocabulary more accurate while retaining the range you are attempting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of sentence forms, including complex clauses with “before,” “while,” and “after which,” and most of the trends remain understandable. Some grammatical errors nevertheless affect accuracy and clarity. For example, “In 1960, pattern for manufacturing” is missing an article, while “15 millions” and “the 1960” have incorrect number or article forms. The sentence beginning “Similarly, the pattern for healthcare…” becomes structurally unclear around “by outnumbering the healthcare in 1980,” and the final phrase “which was the same” is incomplete. Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent. Practise complete, direct comparison sentences and check articles, plural forms, and clause structure, especially when combining several details.

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