Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the data between 1960 and 2020 about the number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare in the US.

Overall, the manufacturing sector counted the highest number of jobs in the timeline. On the other hand, the agriculture showed the least number of jobs and gradually decreased over time. It is noticeable that the others continued to score higher gradually.

The retail counted slightly over 5 millions in 1960 whereas the healthcare scored approximately half of 5 millions of jobs. These values gradually increased througout the years and ultimately reached just above 15 millions in 2020.

The number of jobs in the manufacturing sector was exactly 15 millions in 1960, then increased to 20 millions in 1980 which was the peak value counted. After that it reduces gradually and ended up to slightly less than 15 millions in 2020. By contrast, the number of jobs in agriculture sector was slighlty over 5 millions in 1960 and reduced below 5 millions in 1980 and followed a straight line till 2000. Then it slightly decreased in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and provide a clear general overview: agriculture declines, while the other sectors rise overall. Several key figures are also reported accurately, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980 and its fall to below 15 million by 2020. However, the overview misstates the ranking: manufacturing was not the highest throughout, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million in 2020, above manufacturing’s roughly 13 million. The claim that the other sectors “continued to score higher gradually” also overlooks manufacturing’s decline after 1980. Healthcare and retail are grouped together, although their starting points and growth patterns differ. A more precise overview and fuller comparison of their later trends would make the report more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing the rising sectors and the two declining or fluctuating sectors. Sequencing expressions such as “Overall,” “After that,” and “By contrast” help readers follow the account. However, the grouping in the third paragraph is not fully logical: retail and healthcare are presented together as if their trends were alike, but healthcare rises much more sharply, from about 2 million to 16 million, while retail grows from about 6 million to 16 million. Some linking is also mechanical, and “the others” in the overview is not a precise reference. Grouping the sectors by trend and using clearer comparisons would improve progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing a graph, including “illustrates,” “gradually increased,” “peak value,” and “reduced.” These choices make the main trends understandable, and you attempt some variation rather than relying only on “went up” and “went down.” However, several expressions are imprecise or unnatural for data description: “counted the highest number,” “the healthcare scored,” and “continued to score higher” do not collocate naturally with job figures. There are also spelling errors in “througout” and “slighlty,” and “5 millions” uses an incorrect plural form. Choose standard reporting verbs such as “stood at,” “rose to,” and “declined to,” and check spelling and number forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast clause beginning “whereas” and a time sequence with “then.” Most sentences communicate the intended trends, and errors rarely prevent understanding. Some grammatical inaccuracies remain, however. For example, “the agriculture showed” needs an article or a different construction, while “it reduces gradually” shifts into the present tense despite describing past data. In “then increased to 20 millions … After that it reduces,” the tense sequence is inconsistent, and “ended up to” uses an incorrect grammatical pattern. There are also issues with plural forms and sentence punctuation. Keep the past tense consistent and review articles, agreement, and verb patterns when describing historical figures.

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