Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The line graph illustrates changes in the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy namely, manufacturing,retail,agriculture and healthcare,between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, manufacturing experienced a considerable decline after reaching its peak level in 1980, whereas healthcare employment increased substantially throughout the period.Retail jobs also showed an upward trend,while agriculture showed a downward trend. By 2020, retail and healthcare had become the leading employment sector.

In 1960, manufacturing accounted for approximately 15 million jobs, making it the largest employment sector.This figure climed to a peak of around 19 million in 1980 before declining steadily to approximately 16 million in 2000 and 11 million by 2020.In contrast, retail employment rose consistently from about 6 million in 1960 to 9million in 1980.It substantially increased to nearly 14 million in 2000 and about 16 million in 2020.

Healthcare employment followed a markedly upward trajectory, rising from approximately 2 million job in 1960 to 4 million in 1980 and 11 million in 2000. It then reached around 16 million in 2020. Conversely, agriculture declined from approximately 6 million jobs in 1960 to 3 million job in 1980, before falling farther to 2 million in 2000 and just 1 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response selects the main trends and gives a clear overview: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, healthcare and retail rise, and agriculture falls. It also supports these points with figures across the period, so the key features are addressed. However, several values differ noticeably from the chart: manufacturing is about 17 million in 2000 and 13 million in 2020, rather than 16 and 11; retail is about 10 million in 1980 and 15 million in 2000, rather than 9 and 14; agriculture is about 3 million in 2000 and 2 million in 2020, rather than 2 and 1. The overview’s claim that retail and healthcare are the leading sectors is sound, but more accurate reporting would strengthen the support for the comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The information is organised clearly into an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. The progression from the overall trends to specific sector figures is logical, and contrasts such as “In contrast” and “Conversely” help readers follow the comparisons. Grouping manufacturing with retail, then healthcare with agriculture, is also effective. To make the cohesion more polished, vary the repeated sentence openings and ensure punctuation separates items in the introductory list. The final paragraph’s contrast marker works, although the two sectors could be linked more explicitly as opposing trends. Overall, the structure is easy to follow, with some room for more flexible linking and smoother phrasing.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a suitable range of trend vocabulary, including “considerable decline,” “reaching its peak,” “upward trend,” and “markedly upward trajectory.” These choices communicate the main movements clearly and show some flexibility beyond basic terms. A few word-form and spelling slips reduce precision: “climed” should be “climbed,” and “job” should be plural in “2 million job.” Some phrasing is also less natural, such as “leading employment sector” when referring to two sectors, and “fell farther” for a downward trend. More precise collocations and careful proofreading would help you use this range with greater control and move closer to consistently natural expression.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The response includes a useful mix of simple and complex structures, including the contrast clause “whereas healthcare employment increased substantially” and the participial phrase “before declining steadily.” Most sentences communicate the intended comparisons clearly. Some punctuation and spacing errors remain, particularly in the opening list and around sentence boundaries, and the phrase “retail and healthcare had become the leading employment sector” has a number-agreement problem because it refers to two sectors. The construction “from approximately 2 million job” also needs a plural noun. These errors do not prevent understanding, but more consistent control of agreement, plurals and punctuation, alongside the existing sentence variety, would improve accuracy.

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