Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The trend graph depicts the employment number in four economical sectors of the US from the year 1960 to 2020. The four sectors are manufacturing industries, harvesting site, commerce and health services.

The most jobs were provided in production companies with the peak arising in 1980. However after 1980 a decline has been shown in this career. Trade and medical care sector has shown the same trend approximately but the employment rate of retail was almost 4 million high than the healthcare sector. The number of roles became equal at 2020. The agriculture had been the same populated as commerce around 1960 but after 1980 it showed a steep decline in jobs

For now being, the patient and customer centered roles are on the top list for occupations. conversely, farming hasn't shown a great development. other sectors still shown improvement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify several relevant patterns, including manufacturing peaking in 1980 and then declining, and agriculture falling over time. You also note that healthcare and retail become leading sectors by 2020. However, the account is only partial: it gives few figures and misstates the comparison by saying retail was “almost 4 million high than” healthcare, whereas healthcare was about 4 million lower in 1980 but the two sectors were approximately equal in 2020. The claim that agriculture was as large as commerce around 1960 is also inaccurate: agriculture and retail were both about 6 million then. There is no clear, complete overview of all four trends, and the response is 10 words below the required minimum. Add key figures and describe the main changes more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic sequence: it introduces the chart, comments on manufacturing, compares retail with healthcare, and ends with agriculture and a general conclusion. This gives the reader some organisation, but the progression is not consistently clear. For example, “The number of roles became equal at 2020” follows a comparison that says retail was higher, without clearly explaining which sectors are being compared or how the relationship changes. The final paragraph shifts abruptly to “For now being” and broad claims about occupations. Paragraphing is limited, and connectors such as “However” and “conversely” do not always make the relationships between points clear. Group the trends into a logical overview and detail paragraphs, and use explicit comparisons and references.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “employment,” “decline,” “steep decline,” and “improvement,” so the main subject is generally understandable. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural and sometimes obscure meaning: “economical sectors,” “harvesting site,” “commerce,” and “the same populated as commerce” do not describe the chart’s categories clearly. “For now being” and “top list for occupations” are also unsuitable expressions in this context. Prefer the chart’s labels—manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare—and use standard trend language such as “employment,” “rose,” “fell,” and “remained stable.” More accurate collocations and less reliance on vague phrases would make the description clearer and more precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use some simple sentences and attempt longer structures, for example, “However after 1980 a decline has been shown in this career.” Meaning is often recoverable, but errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms remain noticeable. In “Trade and medical care sector has shown the same trend,” the subject is plural and needs a plural verb, while the article is also missing. “The number of roles became equal at 2020” uses an unsuitable preposition and an unclear construction; “the figures were equal in 2020” would be clearer. The final lines also contain sentence-boundary and capitalisation problems, including “conversely” after a full stop and “other sectors.” Use a consistent past tense for the historical data, check articles and agreement, and punctuate complete sentences carefully.

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