Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-20
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph shows details about the number of jobs in four branches of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, the number of jobs in healthcare sector continiously rose from like 2 million to almost 16 million. However, in 1960 manufacturing sector had the highest jobs which was 15 million, and in 1980 it had a significantly rose to 20 million. But From 1980 manufacturing sector jobs continiously fell at the end it was like 13 million.
On the other hand, retail and farming sectors jobs was at the same threshold at 6 million. But retail sector jobs significantly up to 16 million which was also same as healthcare. However, agriculture sector jobs was at the 6 million in 1960 but it fell consistantly to almost 2 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You identify the main overall contrast: healthcare rises substantially, while manufacturing peaks and then declines, and agriculture falls. The figures you give for these trends are broadly consistent with the graph. However, the response is under the required 150 words, so it has limited space to report and compare the key stages. Retail’s steady rise from 6 to 16 million is mentioned, but its intermediate values and its overtaking of manufacturing by 2020 are not explained. The overview also says retail and agriculture were at the same level in 1960, but does not clearly summarise how the four sectors compare at the end. Add a fuller overview and a few well-chosen comparisons to develop the summary.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a basic overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and sentences describing the sector trends. Linking phrases such as “Overall” and “On the other hand” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, the progression is not always clear because several trends are packed into long sentences, and “However” and “But” are used repeatedly without always marking a clear contrast. The second paragraph also moves between retail and agriculture without a clear comparison of their changes over time. Organise the details into clearer groups—for example, rising sectors and declining sectors—and use more precise links between the comparisons. This would make the report easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “rose,” “fell,” and “highest,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and some choices are informal or imprecise for an academic report, such as “like,” “farming sectors,” and “same threshold.” There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “continiously” and “consistantly,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise trend language and avoid repeating “jobs” and “sector” where a clear reference is possible. For example, “employment in agriculture” is more natural than “agriculture sector jobs,” and “reached approximately” is more suitable than “was like.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mixture of simple and linked sentences, and the reader can usually understand the intended trends. However, errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction occur throughout. For example, “retail and farming sectors jobs was” has a plural subject with a singular verb, while “it had a significantly rose” combines incompatible verb patterns. Phrases such as “in healthcare sector” also need an article, and the sentence beginning “But From 1980” has awkward punctuation and capitalisation. Practise building accurate comparison sentences with a clear subject and verb, such as “Manufacturing employment rose to 20 million in 1980 before declining.” Greater control of these patterns would make your range more effective.
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